Life in Peru and beyond

Back online and ready to blog

2012-02-01T08:37:00.003-05:00

With the launch of a couple of Habs Geographical blog pages (still to be finalised) I am also resuming this blog. I have been absent for a while, as the hectic and unplanned return from Peru meant a break from the blogs and getting life sorted and restarted down in the South (of course it is somewhat North of Lima!!!) has meant that life has veered away from forthnightly updates.
Since the last bolg we have obviously returned to the UK, both got new jobs (after a time of unemployment) and have enjoyed our life bringing up Tilly oser to our families again (although probably not as close as they would like).
Anywho - off to teach now. Posts will start again very soon.

Tilly Pitts Nasca Nightmare.

2010-10-14T14:31:00.010-05:00

So after the news that 3 British tourists had died in a crash at the nasca Lines, the fact that we were travelling there one week later was never going to be great news for family back home.
Although it is strange that 3 British people dieing makes front page news in the UK but the 3 Peruvians that died in the same flight only made page 32 of the Sunday newspaper here.
So we got down to Ica where we were staying (see the previous blog) and we had an amazing day relaxing in the sun by the pool and then heading back to the beautiful oasis of Huacachina for drinks and food. After the Peruvian Police's attempts to turn this trip into another nightmare, the 30 degree temperature, sun, pool and desert oasis soon put all that behind us. Add to that the amazingly friendly staff at the Belle Sands Hotel and everything was back on track and we truely felt like we were on a summer holiday. We went to bed early, read for a while and then went to sleep for an early start to head down to the aforementioned Lines.
We had a quick breakfast and then headed back to the danger zone of the Peruvian roads. The journey down had been a chore due to PC Plod but this one was a different level of disaster thanks to the single carriageway, mountainous route and nowhere to bloody overtake lorries going at 30 miles per hour. It therefore took us 3 and a half hours to do a journey that should take about 2. Add to that the fact that we could not find the airport in Nasca (nothing is signposted in this country - not even speed bumps in the middle of major highways - yes you read that right speed bumps on roads that are an equivalent of the M1)and there was one very annoyed Mr Pitt sat in the front of the car.
We finally found the airport after Clare got out of the car to ask the poorest man in the world for directions. Not that these directions helped at all! Straight on and left was his answer to Clares much improved Spanish. We went straight and left and found ..........nothing. Clare then asked the second poorest person in the world the way - straight on and left he said. By this point we were not sure whether this was the answer to every question a tourist asks or whether they spoke a native Peruvian language and these were the only 2 words they knew in Spanish. Eventually straight on and RIGHT got us there. Well I say got us there- it got us to a place that was signposted airport, the fact that it looked like a field in the middle of a desert surrounded by a cobbled together wall would be a more accurate signpost. We looked at each other and it was clear that this is not a place that any kind of responsible parent would let their daughter go to. This is not the kind of place that any responsible adult would allow themselves to go to.
Imagine Heathrow airport built by people with no thumbs, no eyes, no co-ordination, no clue and no raw materials and you are still nowhere near what this place looks like. Needless to say - we turned around to go home again and stop off at the viewpoint in order to see the Worldfamous Lines from the safety of solid ground. But first we were all desperate for the toilet (well obviously Tilly wasnt but it was clear that she was desperate for a change by the smell that was now swirling around the hot and muggy car).
We looked for a place that would look clean enough to have an acceptable toilet and we kept looking and we kept looking; we passed 5 restaurants, 10 more restaurants, 53 more restauarnts and still each one looked like 4 sheets of cardboard held together by a plastic sheet thrown over the top. The food would have led to Peruivan Belly case number 6 for me and the toilets would not even be worth imagining. Finally we found a decent enough looking toilet at an Internationally recognised petrol station (safe enough surely).
On entrance to the toliet the smell was tangible, the number of flies made the room look dark even in the middle of the day and the walls, although brown in appearance had clearly once been painted white. The urinal was just about descernable at the back of the room as I clawed through the fly entrance curtain. I was desperate and there was no turning back now. As I was completing my much needed bodily function, I peered to the right and had I not already started my necessary deed, I would have run away as fast as I could.
In Peru, in the poorer areas, you are not meant to put toilet paper into the toilet but rather into the bin at the side of the toilet bowl. This bin is then emptied daily or hourly in the more up-market toiletries. However, This particular W.C. did not seem to think that daily emptying was needed, it also did not think that weekly empties were needed but rather a yearly waste collection would suffice. This had been the most sanitary appearing washroom in the whole of Nasca and now I was looking into a cubicle that resembled what Andy Dufrain has to crawl through at the end of Shawshank Redemption (apologies not for the graphic comments ((as I could never be graphic enough to re-produce this scene))but for the spoiler!). In England this place would have been shut down years ago, it would have had toxic health warnings - In Peru, it is the best of a bad bunch! After this unpleasant stop-off, what else could we do but go next door for chips!
Tilly was again centre of attention in the road side diner and yet another waitress went to pick up Tilly without asking. We could not really stop her as Tilly was alofted into the air before our eyes and the only saving grace was that she did ask before handing Tilly around the rest of the staff. The male manager seemed particularly taken by our smiling daughter as the waitresses took pictures of him holder this strange smiling giggling white baby.
Then came our trip to the viewpoint. I will have to stop calling it a viewpoint from this moment onwards as their is no VIEW and honestly no POINT to walking up the hill. You cannot see anything, you cannot make out what the lines are meant to be, you cannot see a monkey or humming bird or anything else the guidebook claims would be visble. You simply see a couple of big lines in what looks like the same desert you have been seeing for the last 6 hours of driving. The Nasca Lines may look spectacular from the air but you have to enter the airport of death first and other that this, the town is dirty, packed and poorly signposted and there is nowhere to eat or go to the loo.
Our journey home was the highlight of the Nasca trip as Ron's Rock VI blared out of the radio and 'We Built This City' could be heard echoing for miles around the baron desert wastelands of Peru.

The Pitts, policeman, pelicans and paracas

2010-10-14T14:17:00.003-05:00

We finally made it to the end of the 10 week term and have been rewarded with 6 days off school. We kindly had a car lent to us by some friends from school and so headed off down south to search for sun.

The damp grey of Lima had soaked through to the marrow and we knew it would take a serious dose of sunning to get our bodies back to normal functioning speed.

We firstly however had to deal with my first experience of driving in this mad city. Lima, where the only rules of the road are that there are no rules. You can cut anybody up as long as you stick your hand out of the window, it seems that if you are female you are not allowed to drive without a phone attached to your ear, you are not allowed to check your wing mirrors - just go – and never ever think about checking your blind spot. On top of that, never use your indicators and in stead use your horn to let people know that you are about to veer into their lane, don’t worry about MOTs or emissions – as long as your car can go forward (however slowly) it is ok to drive and do not worry about how many men you have hanging out of the top of your lorry or out of the side of your bus – remember you can always fit more in there!

So with the rules of the road fully memorised we headed off. We started out at 5.30 in the morning to try and make the journey out of the city easier but the thing we forgot is that starting that early just makes you more obvious (especially with two very white people driving a car packed to the brim with Tilly’s stuff!). So we made it to an hour outside of Lima when the police called us over.

The police had set up a road block just outside the coastal resort of Asia and as far as we could tell – all they were there for was to make money! They pulled us over, saw we were tourists and then went through everything that they could possibly fine us for. We had our passports colour scanned, we had our driving licences, we had all the relevant car documents (thanks Jason), I had only had one beer the night before, we were driving well under the speed limit and so surely there was nothing they could fine us for – WRONG! Firstly they tried telling us that we only had a permit to drive in the city and we were outside of city limits (I pleaded ignorance and just spoke really quickly at him in English), he realised that this was a silly excuse and so rather than going for a more sensible way to fine us he said that we were to be fined for driving in the left hand land of a dual carriageway! I tried hard not to laugh, now knowing the police could make up any old excuse at all to fine you and so asked how much the fine was. Clare was conscious of me now communicating in Spanish when we were trying to plead ignorance and so gave me a quick poke in the ribs and the ignorance game continued. He pointed at a random fine in the booklet (400 dollars!!!!) even though the offence next to the fine did not match what he was saying we were now very clear that this was not an English type of pull over. We were not in control, there was no innocent until proven guilty and no ticket that we could then pay at the local police station. This man was like a Peruvian Judge Dredd – He was the law! I asked where we could pay the fine (knowing that tourists do not have to pay roadside offences as there is no way of tracking them down) he was well aware of this and said we had to pay now.
Whilst he was saying this, I snuck my wallet to Clare for her to remove as much money from it as possible (I think that is also what many husbands will say as their wives depart on yet another shopping trip!). But as we looked in, the smallest bill we had was a 100 soles (just over 30 dollars for those reading in England) and so this was going to have to be our bribe.
As I said, this was no English pull over and so bribery is always an option. I therefore slipped him the 100 under my licence. He looked at it, slipped it into his pocket and he handed back all of our documents. We were free to go.
The ignorance had not worked, Clare pleading “senor – bebita” had not worked, the fact that we had not done anything wrong had not worked and so money was the final option.
He then repeated my name another couple of times as if to scare me but actually I was just impressed the man could say Jonathan and then with a final reminder that we had to drive on the right hand side – we were off – free from the law and the seriously corrupt police that we had just passed. The only thing that made us feel better was that they were doing exactly the same to every car and I would imagine were earning more money than there pay packet gives them in a year.
Now I do not have a problem with people earning an honest living. There are millions of people in this country living in poverty, there are beggars, shoe shiners, sweet sellers, combi drivers, illegal DVD sellers, car parking men, watchy men, bodega owners, street performers, bag packers……. The list goes on and on. They are poor, poorer than an English person can even imagine (most ex-pats here just don’t think about it and just carry on enjoying their blissful, sheltered existence) but they all have one thing in common; THEY WORK HARD! This country thinks it is based on the rich people that live in their botoxed, bubble but it is actually supported by the poor people that work tirelessly and always with a smile on their faces and not due to plastic surgery gone wrong!. They are the real Peru, they are the foundations of what may eventually make this country powerful again but it could all be ruined by PC Pedro and his merry gang of thieves. The fact that tourists can get stopped and exploited will not exactly help the economy of this place. The tourist attractions I will rave about in this blog will not be enhanced by this behaviour and it will merely put people off coming here. It will make people think twice before they click on that Peruvian flight when they can go to the Niagra Falls, Uluru, Phuket for the same price and in the knowledge that they will not be exploited by crooked policemen.

Sorry- I feel that I have now ranted enough and am ready to continue with the Paracas tale (see the above blog)

Tilly Pitt and the Pizza Party

2010-10-03T10:24:00.005-05:00

Just to keep people up to date with the adventures of Tilly Pitt in Peru - she is now gurgling mumbled nonsense regularly, putting anything and everything that she can grad straight into her mouth, grabbing random people's faces anytime they get too close and she is starting to eat food and what an eater she is! The All Great and Powerful Gina Ford warned that starting food could be a difficult job and finally she has been proven wrong. Tilly has taken to eating like her dad takes to ... well eating! She loves avacado, she loves peas, she loves carrots, she loves banana, she loves cabbage, she loves cauliflour- if it fits onto her incredibly colourful sppon then she is sure to open wide and let it in (Grandparents dont worry, although the blog is titled Tilly Pitt and the Pizza Party, it is just because of the photo - Not because we have started her on Pizza yet!)
Her swimming is also coming along nicely. She swam for 5 seconds yesterday. Well, when I say swam - Clare held her under teh water for 5 seconds. This ritual drowning then seems to be contragulated by the big 'gay'Peruvian swimming instructor. Now when I say gay - I mean big jovial and bubbly and in very much the old fashioned sense of the term. Even after a couple of months I have never seen this man stop singing, stop smiling or stop humming his version of childrens songs. He is the incredible smiling man and I am sure that he must get home and keep on singing to himself all day long.
This week also saw us venture to Bon Jovi but the excitement of that day will have to be saved for the next Blog!

Jonathan Pitt and the Incredibly Long Term

2010-10-03T10:08:00.003-05:00

Phew! What a long and tiring term. 3 parents evenings in the last 3 weeks, a ten week term, 3 options evenings and multiple after school meetings on top all go to make me one officially knackered out teacher. The good news is that I still think that Tilly recognises me after I have hardly seen her over the past few weeks but then again I cant really tell as she just smiles at anyone and everyone anyway.
On their walk to the supermarket Tilly and Clare seem to have accumulated a group of random friends. The watchman on the corner is a regular (and he has to say hello as we pay him) but the others are a wonderful rag-tag group.
There is the old man at the bulding site who shouts at anyone making lude comments towards Clare, there is the lady with no teeth who takes a break from begging to shout out how 'Linda' (cute) Tilly is looking, there is the security guard from the fish restaurant that always stops to smile and talk to Tilly, there is the sweet store lady who runs over to say how smily Tilly is, there is the illegal DVD seller, the car parking man with the hunch back, the man who dresses like a woman and the Peruvian man that slurs his English as he asks us around for drinks becuase he has heard "English people love their beer". All these people get the same greeting - Tilly pulls off a huge smile and wiggles her legs incesantly. They love it and it all adds to the increasing group of people that stop Clare and Tilly on their travels around Lima.
The delay in writing the blog comes from the 3 month period without Internet and also the amount of work I am having to do in the Geography department. This week should see a turn around in the work (after I have finished my reports and coursework marking) and we finally have Internet thanks to the big dongle that we now have.
So chiao for now and hopefully the blogs will be back to becoming more regular again!

Tilly The Swimmer and Tilly the Traveller Part 2

2010-08-19T07:00:00.004-05:00

Another long gap between posts but again, I think, a rather valid excuse. This time it has been lack of Internet (still!!!!) and organising past papers and 3 fieldtrips at work. Time has just slipped away but hopefully I still have all the memories of Rio imprinted firmly in my brain to include in the blog.
First however, I must mention the exciting news of Tilly's first swimming session. We went on a mission to find a pool that she could swim in and heard on the Peruvian grapevine (about as reliable as the Peruvian wine in produces) that there was one near school. We therefore headed straight over to look for the swimming pool. It was nowehere to be seen, there was no smell of chlorine nearby - a smell to which I am well atuned from my lifetime spent in or next to a pool - and there was no building with slides jutting out of the side or any sort of pebble dash or corrugated iron effect (as sported by many a British council pool). We were just about to give up when a securitry guard on a segway scooted past (I think that is the correct term for what you do on a segway) and I asked him where the pool was (of course not forgetting to add the International sign language movement for swimming as I spoke to him in my Spanglish). He seemed to understand and he told us where to go. Minutes later when we still had not found a building that looked anything like a pool, said segwayman came scooting back and took us straight to it. We stood outside and yet still we did not believe it was a pool.
It seems a theme in Peru that the more extravagant the building and the more posh the facilities, the more boring it should look from outside. On the way to school, when people pop out of their securitry fences to get the paper or the bread delivery you can see into their little gated world and witness the wonders of within. The more dull the outside, the more their wonderous world tends to impress. And so this gave us some hope for the pool. The outside looked like 2 up, 2 down house and Clare, I looked at each other wondering how a pool would fit into a terraced house (I am sure some tax dodging British person has tried to put one in their living room though).
We walked in and soon found that the place was like Doctor Who's tardis, it expanded backwards and became huge as you wlaked in. Not only was there a pool, there was 2! and for the first time in 4 months, there was actually a warm room in Lima. This boded well for the pool being warm too and one finger strategically placed in the water told us that it was soon to be swim time for Tilly.
We bathing suited her up, bought a rediculously expensive swimming cap (it was the opposite of British bars "If you dont have a cap, you're not getting in!") for her and then Clare and Tilly got in. Tilly loved it, Clare loved it and the camp Peruivan instructor seemed to love evrything in the whole world. I have never seen a 40 year old man sing and smile as much as this man. He is a human baby song hummer and he can sing a Spanish nuresery rhyme more camply than any other man alive! Stil, Tilly likes him, she smiles and because of that we are able to get her head under the water and build her confidence. There was another baby boy in the pool with Tilly who was swimming under the water and doing great and Clare had to hold back my competitive streak from trying to compete with him. "He's 11 months old!" Clare had to tell me, as I was wanting to beat him and show what Tilly could do. So I think it may have been for the best that Tilly's first session was with her mum and that steady progress was trhe order of the day rather than the dunking session I would have possible dealt out (it may have stopped the camp singing though).

Now back to Rio for the second Part of Tilly The Traveller:
Day two started well. We went down to the buffet breakfast with mouths watering at the prospect of bacon, waffles, eggs, cheeses galore and a selection of meat that would make dewhursts proud. But then as we went to walk into the restaurant one of the Sheraton Nazi Clone workers asked us which room number we were. 1009, I replied. “I am sorry Sir, you are not on the list!” You could see a smile emerge on her face as she was also thinking – if you are not on the list, you are not coming in!. Clare and I looked at each other and knew there was a mistake “I know I have paid for the breakfast” I said. She paused. How can he be this confident if he is not wearing a suit? You could see she was thinking. “are you with Taca airlines the lady asked”. “Yes we are!” was Clare’s swift response and before you could say Eggs Benedict we were sat in a table eating the Breakfast of The Gods.
On returning to our room, we soon saw that our reservation did not include breakfast (an oversight on my behalf after the Despegar debacle of two weeks previous). So we were no longer set to enjoy the breakfast of the Gods, we were back to normal riff-raff but without breakfast. We were below riff-raff, we were outcasts from breakfast time, forced to wonder the streets in search of food and coffee. However I will take this opportunity to thank Taca airlines for inadvertently covering the cost of our 50 dollar breakfast and I hope that nobody from the airline reads my blog and realizes the mistake!
We did however have our day mapped out. We were going to go to the statue of Christ and we were then going to return and use the pool and relax in the sun reading our hugely educational books (Lee Child and Michael Connolly).
We went to the desk to ask how much the trip to Jesus was. $100 dollars plus the cost of the tram (another $80). On that news, we went to the in hotel travel agent to see how much their trip was – another 200 dollar trip. OK then we decided to break Roughguide Rule number one again and take the bus (5 dollars for all 3 of us). This time we made sure we travelled in Tilly’s awake time and allowed the Little Miss Tilly to actually get some sleep in the daytime. This therefore meant a hugely delayed start but no more screaming and no looks of condemnation from the locals or Jesus! We got to the base of Jesus’s mound at about 3.00 after much bus delay and the walk to Copacabana beach. Great, we will have time to get up, get back and then go and sit by the pool.
But then a coach arrived full of tourists, then another and then another. Each coach emptied its loads of suit wearing business men from every nation of the world. It looked as though the United Nations was having a convention on top of Jesus’s mound. From the experience at the Sheraton, we knew the situation was hopeless. People in suits are Kings in Rio and us wearing our tatty clothes (following the rough guides rules of not looking rich) therefore had no chance! We looked like poor people and were duely treated as such when we were told that there would be a 2 hour wait for a tram up to Jesus. We had again been trumped by the men in suits and a 2 hour wait was our only hope. How would we kill 2 hours. By breaking Roughguide rule number 3 is how – go for a walk! We walked around the streets of Concovado fitting in with our tatty clothes and with Tilly there to keep us safe. Again we were looked at by dubious looking youths but mainly just to see our baby in a babycar and for them to comment on how cute (Lindo) she looks.
Not knowing where we were heading, we saw a little café that sold beers for 3 reals (a dollar) and headed straight for it. 2 beers please! Then another 2 and then another 2 please. I was not sure what Clare was going to have, but I was sorted. I am sure Jesus would approve when we see him later! We also found that this place was a hidden gem of a restaurant and they made the best Fillet Mignon sandwiches ever known to man! So rather than being mugged and robbed by breaking rule 3, we were fed, beered up and all ready to meet Christ.
Now if you have seen the statue on TV, been her in person or even just seen our photos on Fickr, it is clear that this is a sight worth seeing. The statue is impressive in itself as it soars mejestically above the vast city below but the views of the city itself are what make this trip exceptional. Trip to Rio (a lot of dollars), tram ride to the top (40 dollars), view from the top at sunset - priceless.
The sheer number of tourist could not spoil the view and the experience, the half hour wait for a tram back down could not spoil it and even Tilly crying like an air raid siren on our way back down on the tram could even not spoil the day.

I would recommend the experience to anyone and it meant that day 2 ended with excitement, looking forward to the trip to Sugar Loaf mountain the next day.

Oh, one final point - on the bus ride home Clare turned to me and said "was that a dead person?". Not being used to being asked this kind of question I just looked at her a bit confused and tried to see what she had witnessed out of the window but could not see anything. "I think it was," she said, "It was a body lying on the road with a sheet over it and with only the legs sticking out" she then continued by saying. The experience was at the same time as the camera exchange men were sat in front of us and gave us a very clear idea of the realities that lie very close to the surface in this city. The gunshots from the shanty town near our hotel then added to the enlightenment and gave us a nice chorus to which we fell softly to sleep ...... and then bolted upright and awake again at the next gun shot!

adios

Tilly (Machilda) Pitt in Rio: Part One

2010-07-29T10:45:00.004-05:00

The evening flight to Rio meant that we had a day of killing time and trying to find somewhere that would change dollars into Argentinian Pesos (we soon found nowhere would). Clare had been spening days getting everything packed to perfection and realising that packing for a baby is a bloody hard job to do. Bottles- check, nappies- check, travel cot- check, dummy for the flight- check, water for formula milk- check, more bloody expensive formula milk- check....... the list goes on and on. Then she also packed for me (shirts- check, jeans- check, pants - check, socks- check, all done).and we were ready to go. A Taxi was flagged down outside our house, fair was agreed in my slowly improving Spanish and off we went in the normal Peruvian style (horn blaring, lane switching and at break neck speed). The flight was easy enough, Tilly slept when she could and, unlike British Airports, common sense prevails. We were given an extra seat for Tilly to sleep on, we were allowed to bring our own water onto the plane to make up the milk (rather than having to pre-book milk with Boots and taste any water to prove that it is not a chemicl bomb ingedient ((although surely a suicide bomber would happily drink chemicals to get them on the plane!!))and we also were put into a priority line for check-in making everything easier for everyone (especially a very stressed out dad). Normally, I am an image of calmness for travelling. I do not get rattled by the process, I am calm and know that getting stressed out (like most people at airports) does no good for anyone. However, now I have an extra little one to think about - I was the exact opposite. I became one of those stressed out travellers (I even made a woman from Taca airlines cry in Rio by shouting at her!). I do not know what has happened to me. I have turned into a typical middle aged British Traveller - may even start wearing comfy trousers to travel in soon and start wearing those socks to stop your veins popping mid-flight. I think it is one step away from ordering those sunglasses in the Sunday Mirror - The ones that fit over your normal glasses. Who knows, next week I may be ordering the plates with pictures of the queen on them to display on the walls of our house (I apologise to Peruvian readers who will have no idea what I am talking about at this point).
So we got to Rio having read the guide book from cover to cover over the course of the flight. There would surely be nothing about Rio that we would not know (including the 20 page section on how dangerous it is and how you are most likely to get mugged and robbed- NICE!). So after reading the book, Clare had joined me in a state of worry and stress and the holiday was off to a lovely relaxed start. Landing at the airport we were instantly scanning the building for people likely to mug us. We whispered to each other when people looked dodgy and acted like sectret agents trying to avoid being followed by slowing our walking speed, pretending to read our books and pointing at things in the distance to pretend we weren't pointing out a strange looking character. The Rio episode of Ross Kemp on gangs soon came flooding back into our memories and suddenly the city of our dreams was becoming a slightly different reality. However, we we quickly began breaking the Rules of the Roughguide as saving money seemed more sensible that keeping safe!?! Roughguide Rule number one - Use taxis as buses can be dangerous. So of course we heard the taxi quote and got straight into the queue for the bus. 40 minutres later and we were in Ipanema (1 hour and 30 minutes after that we were back in Ipanema and on a different bus as the first one did not go to the part of Ipanema we needed and instead took a detour through Rochina). Now anybody reading this that I taught Geography to should have heard of Rochina. It is the world's largest Shanty Town. 200,000 people packed tighly onto the hills of the mountains and home to two of the most dangerous gangs in Rio (and therefore the world). We however took our 4 month old daughter on a bus through it but came out safe and able to tell the tale. It seems that the key to the robbers and muggers is that they go for anyone looking lost, looking rich and not in a family group. Roughguide Rule number 2 - do not look wealthy. Therefore Clare did not wear her engagement ring and we did not take any clothes that had labels or names on them but none of this was the main reason we were safe. The main reason was Miss Tilly herself. 2 mean looking men got onto one bus and looked a little angry that we were blocking the back seats. You could see their heads thinking 'how can we look extra mean if we are not on the back seats'. But then they saw Tilly in her pushchair (or baby car as the Brazilians called it) and they both smiled. I felt the stress level subside slightly and I began to not think about the $1000 camera that I had in my bag. I needn't have worried too long as the men proceeded to show each other even more expensive cameras that they had clearly swiped off tourists over the course of the day. But rather than ask for ours, they instead smiled at Tilly and even helped us off the bus at our stop. Tilly to the Rescue.
The first bus journey eventually got us to our hotel and what a hotel it was. It had its own beach, 3 swimming pools, a view overlooking Leblon and Ipanema beaches and staff that were hugely helpful any time day and night. Oh, I should have added that they were hugely helpful any time day or night as long as you were wearing a suit!!! This hotel was amazing but the staff were so preoccupied with the people with huge money that the regular people were treated like scum on the bottom of their PRADA shoes. I may be exagerating slightly but when they saw that our room was not a Junior suite and only had 2 queen sized beds, they instantly knew that we were to be considered general riff-raff.
Despite having travelled all night. We knew we had to make the most of our first day so we soon walked into Ipanema, sat next to the beach and had our first Coco Verde (Coconots that the servers slice open for you and stick a straw in). I felt my stresses of end of term, airports and gangbang attacks start to subdue for the first time as we looked our over the clear blue Atlantic Ocean and felt the sun's rays hit our overly white bodies. It felt like we had never seen sun before as Clare had come straight from an English winter to the ever fogged up Lima. Rio's 26 degree winter was a million miles from the gloom of Peru's capital.
After this, we followed the Rough Guide's advice and got a taxi to Santa Teresa to ride the ancient tram system into the centre of the city. The tram was incredible, the views were amazing but then Tilly decided she didn't like it and started to scream and then scream and scream and scream and scream some more. The stress levels went up again, people were looking and there was nothing we could do. We were stuck on a tram now running through a dodgy part of Rio and we could not get off for another 10 minutes when we were due to reach the centre. It felt as though the eyes of Rio were all looking at us. You could hear tutts of dissaproval from everywhere. Who would bring a baby on a tram? we presumed they were saying in Portugese. I could have sworn at one point the statue of Christ himself even changed position to look down on us and tutt. But still she screamed. She had not slept properly and we were now paying the consequences. We could see the end, the station, the platform, safety. We prayed for it to come closer but we had to stop for another tram going the other way. NOOOOOOO! Still Tilly screamed and everyone looked away from the strange white people with the little baby. Finally the tram rolled to a stop and so did Tilly's crying. She had just been testing us. She was now fine, happy and laughing at her friends in the cot (the bright coloured toys that she seems to like more that her mum and dad!). But the best news was that it was over. Looking at the photos now, the tram ride and the views were amazing but during the trip all we could think about was getting off and getting Tilly calm.
We also had the added stress of just how much the taxi had been to get there (The Rough Guide said taxis were cheap but clearly the RoughGuide author was a very wealthy person) and so Rule number one was quickly thrown out of the window and buses were the new order of the day. Why pay 40 dollars when 3 dollars will do? and so we got a bus (all the buses also had disabled access so no more getting tilly out of her babycar and more importantly, no more screaming!!!!).
The bus was great, Tilly kept us safe and everybody we met was helpful, friendly and loved Miss Tilly. People smiled as we got on, men stopped to help us onto the bus, people picked up things we dropped as we struggled with the babycar and the people of Rio, rather than being violent and dangerous shone through as kind and thoughful folk.
We put Tilly to bed early that night to avoid a repetition of any crying outbursts and we read our books to help bring our first day to a nice relaxing close.

Tilly The Traveller

2010-07-28T13:24:00.005-05:00

Firstly, I must apologise for how long it has been since my last blog entry. Three weeks of illness and then end of term Markham Madness led to no chance to write anything. Add to that the fact that the Internet at home stopped working, along with the laptop, my ipod and the XBOX and it has all been a bit of a technological nightmare. The ipode now sounds like a 1989 walkman complete with whirring tape effect and at times it even sounds like the tape is getting jammed. Only with an ipod you can't take out the tape and wind it back in with your finger - you are just stuck with a music player that won't play music.
With the cost of replacing electronic devices and of the ongoing $200 a month immunisation plan that is still going on - we decided to keep our holiday cheap and just go to Rio de Janeiro and Iguazu falls!!
We booked the holiday around one month ago and were amazed at how easy it was. An amazing website called Despegar.com was our route of booking and we would like you to remember that name as we will tell you now - NEVER USE IT!!! They confirmed our 5 day stay in Rio, they confirmed our flights to Rio and Iguazu and they confirmed our hotel in Iguazu. It was all simple and the emails were sent within the day. Wwe were sorted. Our stressful end to the term would all be worth it as now we were off to a place that we had only previously dreamed of going to. However, they then rang to ask for a deposit via telephone. Wierd, I thought, why would they want a deposit when I paid in full. I was at work and so said I would call back. I did call back and it took me 4 tries and 1 hour 30 to speak to anyone. They then said that they would call back in one hour. I waited, and waited and waited and nobody called back. Then, the next day everything was cancelled. So we tried again and this time went to their offices to pay.
'you cant pay at the offices, its an Internet company' we were told. So instead of taking our money in cash and in person - they sent us back to trying to pay by phone and then the next day they again cancelled all of our reservations.
By this time it was less than a week to go and so we booked our flights through a travel agent and then booked hotels through the ever reliable and decidedly non South American Expedia. So finally we were booked (it now cost A LOT more money but we were going and it was time for the holiday of a lifetime).
We would depart for Rio within 6 days and we would go to Iguazu falls and visit Argentina and Paraguay. All in all it would mean that Tilly The Traveller would have been in 6 countries within 4 months of her life!
Due to the Internet not working the full holiday undates will come in bit by bit but feel free to look at the Flickr photos in the meantime.
Chiao for now.

Tilly Pitt's New Adventures in Babysitting

2010-06-19T13:19:00.005-05:00

Before I even start to pretend that anything else is on my mind, I have got to have a quick rant about England. Not the rugby team this time as we finally won - in spite of Johnson's inadequacies as a tactician and manager - they beat the Aussies and finally selected the awesome Ben Youngs at scrum half. No, I have to rant about the bloody footballers!!!!! How they can earn over £100,000 a week for not caring about their country, I have no idea. Its like they don't know I am out here being ridiculed by Peruvian kids for their uselessness, do they not care about me?I have to turn up to work and face a barrage of abuse from kids, I have to watch the matches in the common room with Peruvian staff laughing at me and the team and I have to walk around the streets with taxi drivers and street vendors laughing at the useless English team. They are turning the country into a place to be laughed at - but at least BP and British airways are doing their best to recify this!
Right rant over, oh apart from the fact that I had to miss most of the match yesterday as I was teaching. Now I know that I did not miss much but knowing that England are playing in the world cup and I am teaching 11 year old kids last lesson on a Friday (when they do not want to be there)is difficult. My frustration with watching the first 20 minutes was clearly taken out on the kids as my sharp response level went up to a ten. If I was doing this to miss the football, then they were going to work!!!
However, work the rest of the week was enjoyable. My S2 class (Justin Bieber and Fifi the invisible dog) finally seem to be getting ineterested in geography as well as random chit chat, my S3 class are working well and my P6 (year 7) class asked some impressive geography questions that meant I finally got to use my brain and have one of those lessons where you seem to navigate the whole of the wonderful world of geography in a 40 minute lesson. The highlight of the working week was going on yet another trip (I feel like I am out of school more than in it at the moment). This time the trip was to Macapaca or Packamacka or somewhere that sounded either like a character from In The Night Garden or a portable rain coat. I did find it funny that we were going on a trip to Packamaca and we would not need a rain coat as it is in the desert. It should be called, Don't Pack a macka (yes, I still tell awful jokes in my lessons and get even fewer laughs than I did at King Edwards). The best joke this week has been - what is the difference between Robert Green and Justin Bieber? ..... Justin Bieber knows how to drop his balls! But at least it is a British spillage that the Yanks are happy about!
The trip saw us go about 45 minutes from school and visit a site of Inca ruins. We carved Inca figures out of soap, we learnt how to make Quipu (ancient abacus), visited a racreated Ica settelment and drank Chica (fermented corn which has had its creation aided by adding saliva! nice!), got growled at by Peruvian hairless dogs and dug for ancient pottery in the sand. The day was not exactly full of learning for the kids but it was fun and gave you a good understanding of the life of the Incas. The digging for artifacts in the sand was at a location that looked perfect for an Indiana Jones film and was amazing how quickly you could find bits of pottery and plates from 700 years ago (although knowing this place, it is not beyond the possibility of the staff planting bits of pottery into the ground for the kids to find). The hairless dogs are a feature of the Peruvian urban and rural landscape and no matter how many times you see them. they never fail to shock you as to just how ugly a dog can be! The beautiful beagles that we see in the park outside our living room window just add to how ugly the bald dogs look, especially when they are seen in the packs that seem to control the night-time streets of Lima.
After the awfulness of the England match (last refernce I promise) it took me a while to get back to myself again but the thought of Clare and I getting to go out on our first date in almost 9 months was enough to lift me from my duldrums. We had booked a babysitter and at 6 oclock we met her at our house (now when I say 6, of course I mean 6 oclock Peruivan time, so more like 6:40). She was impressively late but had come recommended by teachers at the school so she got the benefit of the doubt. We gave her some quick instructions with Clare 'I am ok with this' Pitt, talking at ten to the dozen and hoping that the poor girl could actually understand everything that Clare 'I am clearly not ok with this' Pitt was telling her. The only thing that I am confident of is that Clare said very clearly and slowly that the babysitter would not have to feed Tilly and that we would be back by the time she needs her next feed. I then repeated the fact that Tilly would not need to be fed or changed (So even you readers should be clear of these insructions and also I can imagine that you know where this tale is heading). So mummy and daddy Pitt went out for a curry with friends from school and then went to a nice romantic pisco bar in Miraflores. Curry, alcohol and no pram - it all seemed strangely memorable, like we had done this sort of thing before. We had a vague memory of a life where this sort of thing happened quite regularly. It was lovely to have an evening to ourselves and we had a fantastic night but even with our slightly fuzzy heads from the pisco, we were both keen to get back to our beautiful daughter and make sure the babysitter was as good as the reviews seemed to suggest.
So we got in and there were feeding bottles in the sink and a changed nappy in the bin. Hmm, strange considering the insructions! Was everything Ok, we asked. Oh, yes was her reply. She woke up so I fed her and changed her. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! she had fed her, she had broken the routine, she had gone against the Gina Ford, baby Bible. We had had two weeks of sleep, we had Tilly more trained up that a North Korean footballer and she knew the drill. Now one night with a babysitter and we both saw our sleepless nights returning, we saw a crying Tilly Pitt at 3 and 4 and 5 in the morning coming back and we saw our settled evenings and 7 hours sleep per night being threatened by a babysitter. That night we put Tilly to bed both fearing the worst but the worst did not arise. Our little angel slept through, we woke at seven to feed her and she even went back to sleep after to allow us a lie in!
The day before had even been a day when Tilly had another of her bank busting immunisations. The prices still remain high despite promises that health care is cheap here. Cheap compared to what we keep thinking? Cheap compared to a Ferrari, cheap compared to a Rolex watch, cheap compared to a Tiffany ring but definitely not cheap when compared to free health care back in England! You would have to be an England footballer to find this cheap as they are paid so much to not even try - to walk around the pitch without a care in the world (last mention I promise). The clinica is called the Clinica of Good hope (bodes well), you want more than just hope, I want a trained doctor. Or maybe its just hope that it wont cost as much this time!
Anyway, the injection went well. Tilly was asleep and then woke with a start when the huge needle was inserted but half an hour of cuddling later and she was back to normal, sitting in front of the football (her favourite thing to do it seems) and watching Germany lose- always a good thing!

So that ends our adventures for another week and yet another exciting week in the land of the giant guniea pigs and humming birds (we saw one flying around the flower bed outside our living room window today). I think this week I may start doing what the kids here do and pretending I come from a different country. They all support any country that speaks Spanish as Peru did not qualify for the World Cup. Unfortunately if I follow the same rule it means supporting a team that speaks English and last time I checked Australa and New Zealand weren't exactly doing well in the cup either. Oh well, as their fans are probably also saying at least there is always rugby!

Adios

Andean adventures y La Copa Mondial

2010-06-12T06:00:00.005-05:00

Tilly Pitt's fourth week in Peru has seen her witness the biggest build up to a world cup that I have ever known. The people her go mad for it (even though Peru were no where near qualifying!). The supermarkets are filled with world cup flags, posters, offers and games and the kids in school can only talk about the world cup and mainly how unfair it is that they cannot watch the football in lessons (I have to keep up the school policy even when every part of me would love to give in and put the football on!).
I was not going to write the blog today but after getting up at 5am to watch England versus Australia (in rugby rather than any football ((havent seen any of that yet as I have been at work!)) and whilst watching I have finally come to the conclusion that we are actually not very good. Johnson has not got a clue about how to coach rugby and we look like a bunch of headless chickens running around after some austarlian chickens that clearly have their heads securely and fully attached. I am therefore writing rather than getting very annoyed at the players and shouting obsecenities that would most likely wake up my wife, daughter and everyone else living within a two mile perimeter of the house (about 2 million people then!).
This week has not only been an odd one due to world cup madness but also because it has been patriot week. On Monday it has patriot day and the whole country honours the Peruvians that died in the great Chilean invasion of .... (dont know the year as the assembly was all in Spanish). It is a great idea to have such a patriotic day and the idea of honouring the dead and putting such an importance on the raising of the flag is something that only the BNP manage back at home but even with all the resonance and heartfelt sincerity being spoken by the speakers at school, I still found the whole experience highly surreal and a little bit hiralious. The entire school was standing on the filed watching the flag being raised and this flag raising was preceded by the school prefects pretending to be soldiers and standing to attention, they then raised the flag like the military and the raising was accompanied by the cheesiest music heard since I last turned off a Peruvian soap opera after the tears of laughter starting stinging my eyes and then (as always) it is folowed by the longest national anthem known to man. Now do not get me wrong, the national anthem is also one of the best I have ever heard. It is fun, it has an upbeat repetitive tune and lots of repeated words, but... it is very very long. And finally the best bit. Once the flag had been hoisted and the anthem finally sung, the Peruvian head (yes, there is a Peruvian Headmaster and a normal Headmaster (not that Peruvians are not normal I am just saying that there are two of them) shouted Viva La Peru! and every kid and memeber of staff then shouts "Viva!". It took me quite by suprise, the force, the ferocity and the Communism of it all.
Clare witnessed the same later in the week from our living room window. The local Patriot flag raising gathering was held in the park outside our house only this one was also host to armed soldiers, a huge flag, a big band and an even louder shouting of Viva!
The day after the flag raising assembly saw my second fieldtrip with Len. We went up to the start of The Andes in the middle of Peru (about a 2 hour drive from Lima) and what an eventful trip this was. The madness started within 10 minutes of starting off as we went to enter the main highway. The drive onto the highway was going slowly and we soon found out why. The slip road was being obstructed by a car driving the wrong way up it. This was the equivalent of the entry lane to the M5 and so this car had driven the wrong way down a motorway! And the funniest part was that when we drove past, I looked into the windows of the car and it was full with about seven family members of the driver and not one of them looked concerned, or worried or even like this was a strange or uncommon occurance for them. It was actually probably a much quicker way for them to get around as the other acriiageway was full of traffic, at least people get out of their way on this carriageway.
This country is filled with incredible landscapes and geography that whilst I understand the theory behind it, still seems incredible when witnessed in person. The geography today was shanty towns, huge mountains, massive landslides and the phenomenon of the weather getting clearler, less foggy and less cloudy as you drive to higher altitudes (The equivalent of driving up Snowdon and getting sunnier and warmer weather at the top rather than at the bottom -only we drove up to twice the height of Snowdon).
The mountains were impressive, the mountain villages were a mystery and again it was a trip that geographers and geography teachers in England could only dream of. The village of Mutacana where we ended up at is a geographical suicide village. It is in the path of two potentially catastophic landslides (Huaycos) or mudslides (Lloquias)and would be wiped out should one occur, oh and add to that the fact that this is a huge earthquake risk area!. The goverment do protect the areas but the people are not the target of these measures, only the railway and roads are really saved if a Huayco was to happen. The people would mainly be killed and this was made extra pertinent by just how amiable and nice these people were. Only walking into the village, we were met by kids coming out of playschool just to watch us walk past and wave to us "hola, gringo" was the main gist of their statements aimed at me. I was a celebrity for a day - the Blonde White man comes to town! In the village more kids came up to our group and when I went into a shop, I turned around to see that I had been followed in by 3 local kids who quikly ran off giggling when I said hello.
The impressiveness of the scenery and the combination of human and physical geography was not even spoilt by some of the kids answers; the idea of water moving uphill, the random guesses at geographical answers, the response of 'filtration' to any question asked. "Why do you keep saying the same word?" I asked "becasue it is usually the right answer" said one pupil, "I use vegetation as my random answer" said another - I give to you, The Elite Pupils of Peru!
I will sign off just as England somehow close to within 4 points of Australia - I have no idea how, I just know that the Aussies still don't know how to scrummage. And go off to settle into a weekend of sport (Rugby matches x 3, football matches x 6, grand prix x1, basketball NBA finals x 1 and baseball x 2). Te Amo ESPN!

Adios y vamos Inglaterra.

Eggheads Peruvian style

2010-06-07T14:31:00.005-05:00

Clare and Tilly Pitt's third week in Lima saw the family settle down into the reality of life in Peru. No exciting trips to deserts, no fun filled evenings with trips to Barranco. No, week three saw us settling down in front of the TV at night and had Tilly waiting for dad to get home from work (or rather Clare doing all the baby stuff by the time dad got back from work or meetings or just generally marking).
The week did see some excriment, sorry I mean excitement, for Clare who somehow managed to get projectile poo on her face and in her hair! She had Tily in nappy changing position, laid back with legs in the air, only for Tilly to brew a big wet fart that flung a light brown/green fecal matter into her mother's face! Disgusting but very funny once Clare had smeered the mess from around her mouth.
The evenings have seen us watching more films than any other people in the world but when a copied DVD from the local DVD man costs only 4 soles (about £1) and the picture quality is perfect, there seems no reason to not get all the recent cinematic blockbusters to fill our evening viewing slots. It is either that or some awful US series on the WB channel or listening to awful music on MTV (Justin Bieber seems a favourite over here). I have just about managed to avoid Beiber Fever as it is called even though certain girls that I teach are obsessed with the floppy haired, girlie voiced, pre-pubesent singer. Although the fact that he has made it into the blog may actually show that I am coming down with the first symptoms of Bieber Fever!
The murder in Lima has been somewhat of an exciting addition to life in Miraflores (It has been covered by CNN but I do not know if the news made it over to Blighty ((or anyone else at KES for that matter!)). A US tourist (although they now seem very keen to state his Dutch origins) used a baseball bat to brutally murder a Peruvian lady in a local casino. The story has been all over the news and it was only today that I discovered that the casino and hotel in question is directly opposite Markham College. The Murder Casino is now a new destination on the tourist route of Miraflores and was also first on the list of places the S3 kids wanted to go to on their Miraflores investigation trip. This trip also saw the pupils approached by a wierdo that had them terrified until one of the girl seemed to belatedly realise that the man was not a wierdo and was in fact her Uncle! and saw us witness a motorcycle crash as well as featuring some actual geography on the trip out of school.
The trip was given a more surreal feel by the fact that I had knocked myself out the previous morning by walking into a wall in our house. The attractive arches that decorate the walls are also a deathrap for clumsy oafs to walk into and then slowly stagger about before collapsing into a heap on the floor. I can only assume that it must have looked painful as Clare came running over looking very concerned rather than laughing at me for being an idiot! I do however aknowledge the idioticness (yes I know it is not a word but this is my blog and so I can use whatever words I see fit) of walking into a wall. If it had been Clare claiming that she had walked into a wall I am sure that the police would have wanted to have words with me (although I do not think the Peruvian police really care about much really). My forehead now has a certain C.J.ness to it (no I dont look like the biggest pillock on TV, but I do look like a bit of an Egghead with the lump seeming to grow by the second like some sort of Tom and Jerry cartoon effect).
The rest of the week sees me on another fieldtrip with Len the geography Legend on Thursday and probably a few more DVDs whilst the Pitt family sit on the sofa.

My final comment of this post must be to mention the sad news of Old Joe's passing. The Old Father Time of the Reeve Kennels was sadly put to sleep today and so our thoughts are with John and Denise, especially John who has always had a special bond with Joe and I know will sorely miss one of his best friends. Rest in Peace Joseph.

Adios

Tilly Pitt and The Dune Buggy Adventure

2010-05-31T11:34:00.005-05:00

"I've just seen a Peruvian man's willy!" If I heard Clare say those words once, I heard her say it at least 10 times. Now, this was not some wierd swinging weekend away, it was the fact that the men as we went south from Lima seem increasingly happy to just wap it out wee in the middle of the road. They have no embarassment and do not care who is watching, after a while I even joined in "willy watch" (coming to a BBC early eveing TV slot soon!).
After willy watch unfortunatley came poverty watch as the divide between the rich and the poor in Peru became increasingly apparent. The journey started in Miraflores (land of the rich) but as we headed onto the PanAmericana road, the rich are quickly left behind and the average Peruvian is seen with shocking regularity. We saw people washing their clothes in streams, children covered in dirt walking to their hut of a house and thousand upon thousands more of those hut 'shanty' homes. It is impossible for a western mind to imagine living in these conditions and the voyeuristic creature lying within us all very quickly springs to the surface as we pass a world unknown, unseen and often hidden from us for most of our lives. I have taught this geography for years but seeing it in such vast numbers is still hard to witness and impossible to actually describe.
The journey we were taking was to carry out a geography 'reccy' for a new fieldtrip. The IB have changed their syllabus and so there is no more ecosystem studies and therefore no more Tambopata, those Capucine monkeys will not be seen again for some time! The new destination will be the desert settlements of Ica and Huacachina (still a vast difference from the Land that Time Forgot that is Morecambe Lancashire).
As you approach Ica, the fields become more fertile as desert farming dominates the landscape and then civilisation again surfaces as you hit Ica. The hotel was called Belle Sands and although very average looking from the outside, the place itself is beautiful and will be a luxury stay for the kids when they come here in August. Our stay was only slightly marred by the fact that the Ica football team were also staying there. A strange bunch who seem to have John Terry as a role model judging by the fact that they were oggling Clare en mass even though I was holding here hand and she was carrying Tilly at the time.
We wnet from the elite professional sportsperson hotel to the oasis resort of Huacachina. Here, we hired two guides to take us on a dune buggy tour. Now anyone from social services may want to stop reading now as we also took Miss Tilly on the dune buggy. We asked that the driver went very very slow but still the looks we got from Peruvians as we drove off in the buggy made us feel like we had just won worse parents in the world award 2010! (Mrs Matthews was not nominated this year). The Peruvian idea of parenting is however very different to ours. Why change your child or give her food if another option is to wrap them in even more layers of clothing and blankets!!!
We drove around the dunes for about half an hour and I was not prepared for the spactacle that we saw. The dunes come very close to Iguazu falls for the most impressive geographical features that I have ever seen. The photos look impressive but they do not do these 200metre high piles of sand justice. They really are breathtaking! and any waorries about Tilly were quickly banished after our first stop when rather than being terrified of the bumpy ride or crying, she had instead fallen fast asleep in the carrier strapped to my chest.
The second stop then saw the drivers go to the back of the buggy and bring out wooden snow boards that they handed to us. The 45 degree slope was suddenly no longer a geographical feature - oh no! - it was now a challenge to be sand boarded down.
"lie on your front and use your feet as brakes" the driver recommended. I may have forgotten to use my feet as brakes and so one bruised hand, sandy pants and broken camera later, I found myself at the bottom of the dune.
The guide clearly gave a sigh of relief when he realised that I not was going to sandboard with Tily on my chest. Although judging by her sleeping during the buggy ride, I think she may have enjoyed it!
The buggy then toured us around the biggest dune in the dune field, to another natural oasis and then to the edge of the dune above the main oasis where we took photos with the camera that still worked.
We then sat at the edge of the oasis having pisco sours until it was time to return up the PanAmericana and back from teh glorious desert sunshine to the cloud and fog of Lima. Just another day in the extraordinary life of Tily Pitt.

p.s. I have found a way to locate all the Flickr photos of our travels onto a map. Just go to http://www.flickr.com/photos/jonnypitt456/map?&fLat=-13.5071&fLon=-73.1469&zl=12&order_by=recent to see the map and understand a bit more about where we are and what we have been doing.

Adios

Mrs Pitt Signing In.........

2010-05-22T11:51:00.007-05:00

This will probably be the only time I will write on the blog as there is no way I could ever possibly compete with the 'Thomas Hardy' of Lima! Well where to start on our first week in Lima.
Tilly was amazing on the flight, I was prepared for hell and I was armed with my pack of pacifiers (dummies!) but she was an angel. This could not be said about the poor peruvian baby next to us who cried the entire 12 hours but maybe the ten blankets, hat, gloves and the fact he couldnt breath from being smothered by his mother didnt actually help.
Day one and we jumped in a taxi with Tilly strapped to Jon's front, the taxi driver as he asked us to pay upfront this is unusual behaviour(we are talking 5 soles which is roughly £1.25) after giving him 3 of the 5, he shook his head and claimed it was all 'falso', he asked to see more money 'falso tambien' and by means of offering a solution he very 'kindly' offered to take us to the bank.....I dont think so!well we didnt last long in the taxi as Jon started shouting 'dimembarko' and we found ourselves back on the street and away from the dodgy driver.
Jon tactically kept certain things quiet before our arrival.... I am a great believer in if you have a baby noone actually wants to hear about how many times he/she poos, what colour it is etc etc the fact is everyone i have met so far will inevitably at some point talk about their own toilet habits and their motions, simply because the amount you become ill in Lima is clearly more than anywhere else in the world. When you greet people with the puruvian one cheek kiss you then talk about your bowel movements, put it this way I am dreading when that time comes!
Crossing the roads........Jon never mentioned you take your life in your hands when you cross the road in Lima literally 'Frogger' eat your heart out (For Those of you too young to understand what frogger is - a 1980's amstrad game where a frog tries to cross the road without getting killed!) I have been shouted at numerous times because Tilly has only one blanket wrapped aroung her (as its 30 degrees!!) by not only numerous old ladies but even an 11 year old begga who told me off for Tilly not wearing a hat (this was in the Brazilian bar drinking the 2 for 1 cocktails like responsible parents that we are!) Tilly is also seen as being a freak here; she is a Gulliver like giant in the land of the Munchkins, the fact she can hold her head, smile and is now gurgling at just over 2 months....?dos mesas no no quatro mesas? the peruvians try to insist......
(Editor back again) Having Clare and Tilly here has made me feel like a tour guide through this mad city. Leading them through the life or death guidlines of how to cross the street, which roads to avoid, when to say 'si' and when to say 'no gracias' at the checkout for shopping and trying to combine all the high points of Miraflores, Surco and Barranco into the first week. I had the nervewracking job or trying to sort out injections (many thanks to Mrs Reeves ((with an 's')) for helping Clare with the job of a 6-in-1 jab! and taking her to the most religious clinic in the whole world (large Jesus statues peer down on you as you sit in the clinic and I have also been told that in the operating theatres they have paintings of Jesus guiding the hand of the Surgeons ((I pray they have also had some kind of training too)).
Then taking them to Barranco to try out the wierd and wonderful world of Peruvian food - Lomo Saltado is salted meat with Sweet potatoes and a red onion sauce, it has to be tasted to fully understand just how tasty this is. Also Cevice, which is raw fish dresssed in a lime and red onion sauce (again a Taste Sensation!). Barranco also enabled Clare and Tilly to see their first humming bird and for Clare to stare up at the sky as about 8 vultures circled overhead.
Today was health check day at work. You turn up and then wait in queues with other teachers as step-by-step you are taken through a health production line. Blood test, check. Height measurement, check. Weight, check. Eye test, check. Chest X-ray, check and general MOT overview, check. Everybody seemed amazed that it was all offered free as the Private health clinics pilled advert after advert into your hands for laser surgery, illness insurance plans and (most surreal of all) a man dressed as a giant tooth handed out balloons and dental insurance plans (free indeed!!!!. Anywho - back to today's guest editor.

Anyway I am missing a brilliant game of rugby ( Toulouse V Biarritz, vivo en ESPN mas) so to sum up: the house is amazing ( the boy did very good), the people are kind, the food is great if a little crazy at times and The Pitts are settling well into our life in Lima.
P.s I am now officially a lady that lunches...........

chiao

Tilly Pitt "no pictures please"

2010-05-17T07:08:00.002-05:00

Jungle Boogie Capuchin monkey style!

2010-05-13T20:35:00.009-05:00

The week has finally arived. The Pitt family are re-united and Life in Peru (the name of the blog) can finally actually start. However, before we get into that, there is the small detail of Tambopata to talk about. Tambopata, for those of you not in the know, is the Peruvian rainforest about 2 hours flight East of Lima.
The flight was an early one and so after moaning about teachers' moaning in the last blog, I have to admit that getting up at 4 o'clock on the first day of holiday did magically transform me into one of those moaning teachers. This moaning did quickly fade once I glanced at the magnifiscent mountain scenery over Cusco and faded into obscurity once I was gazing over the meandering Tombopata river as we approached landing.
The airport we landed in was little more than a glorified shed. For those of you that have had the pleasure of visiting the late, great Coventry airport - this made Coventry look like Heathrow and JFK combined! we were met by our guide for the week (Carolina) and we were quickly transferred to a bus and driven down dirt roads lined with the poorest Peruvian people I had seen since my arrival. I was again in real Peru and what a breathtaking experience it is.
The bus was followed by a boat trip down the river that we had spied from the plane. We passed farmers in their boats, people seiving gold in the river, people using long sticks to push their boats along, children in tattered clothes staring at the rich people travelling past with ipods on, cameras out and a whole world that has been taken forgranted. It was also made very clear that this river was the only way to reach our destination. Even the town we had landed in only had one dirt road connecting it to Cusco and that would take 12 hours. We were in total isolation and any thoughts of British risk assessments were rapidly cast aside knowing that this trip is more important than that for the pupils. This is about being remote, not being in the pampered, protected world of Miraflores but in the absolute wilderness with killer snakes, killer spiders and killer diseases. I was finally fully immune from these diseases but only after a visit to a perverted nurse (push your sleeve higher - no higher - no higher - oh actually can you take your shirt off please!). But thankfully I had recovered from this sexual exploitation by the time I was on the boat down the river. The kids however, were not so re-assured by their injections and insect spray. One particular pupil was terrified after watching an episode of House where a person died of a strange mosquito induced disease and thanks to the glory of Wikipedia he has also researched into this more and found that the disease was indeed to be found in the Peruvian rainforest. After much calming words or rather taking the mick out of somebody basing their medical knowledge on House, we managed to get him onto the boat to go to our first destination - Posada.
The whole area is managed by a group called Rainforest. They are a preservation and travel company that offer Eco-tourist trips and help to sustain the local community and protect the rainforest. There is only electricity for 4 hours a day in their lodges, there is no hot water and you can only use bio-degradable shampoo and soap. The showers are therefore cold- freezing cold- and the soap feels like it has been made from the floor sweepings of a branch of Lush. However that was not the worst part of the showers; the worst part was that there was no lock on the door (thank you Mr German man for walking in on me ((and it was a very cold shower by the way)) and also the wooden wall at the back had large gaps in it that faced onto the girl's rooms. This meant tactically timed showers before the kids were awake (I hope anyway).
The activities were also eco-tourist based and were hugely impressive. We walked up a canopy tower to view over the rainforest and the soaring vultures, went on a night walk to see Aligators, tree frogs and tarantulas, went to a clay lick (Culpa) and saw hunders of Makaws arriving to feed (another 4am start for that one) and we went on a boat trip to see Giant otters. This trip was yet again a 4am start but also ending in no giant otters beind seen (maybe thats because Otters are too sensible to get up at 4 in the morning!!!!!!!!!!!!). I did however endanger the Piranha population of Peru. We were given the chance to fish in the river as long as we returned the fish to the ox-bow lake. I fished away and after about 5 minutes I had a bite. I wrestled with the 5cm long beast and managed to get the piranha out of the water only for the little bugger to fly off the hook and slide across the boat and down a gap in the floor. Never mind, I thought, he will just have plopped back in the water.
I have got to go and mark and wash some clothes and baby bed sheets. I will finish this post tomorrow.
..... continued........
the next stage of the journey into The Heart of Darkness saw us have to travel 6 hours by boat via 2 checkpoints and to TRC (Tombopata, Research Centre). 7 of the pupils had already been staying there for a week on Biology trip and thanks to the extreme discipline of their stay, they were wild, loud, excitable and blue!!! On leaving school, we had be warned about the infamous Huito fruit. It is an inocuous looking fruit that when mixed with pure alcohol (in a bowl not via ingestion) turns your skin blue once applied. We had been asked not to let the kids use it on their skin but the Biology group clearly had and it looked as though we had entered the set of Avatar 2. The look of shock on some of the tourists faces as they disembarked from the boat and came face to face with the Markham Savages was hilarious.
Thankfully the savage period lasted for only an hour and the Biology group quickly transformed into mild and gentile Geographers within no time (however, Mr House was slowly turning into an extra from Lord of The Flies as the worry of killer insects and killer spiders became slowly more and more a reality).
The first killer spider that we saw was on a web about 50 metres from the lodge. It was pointed out by the guide who then started poking the web and asking the kids to come closer for photos. I can clearly remember the words "more poisonous that the black widow" and "yes we have the anti-body, but that just buys you time" being uttered by the guide. Buys you time, I thought, how does buys you time help when we are 8 hours by boat from the nearest twon and from the look of it, that town is not exactly the sort of place that top medics would be choosing to stay. Although who knows, maybe top doctors like living in shacks, riding in rickshaws and going to the impressivley named 'sexy car wash'.
The kids also told me that they had saved one of the teachers from death last week as he took them on a midnight hunt for mini-alligators. They were wading through a swamp in the pitch black when one of them spotted moevement in the water, turned their torch to see what it was and discovered the most poisonous snake in the Peruvian rainforest. The snake was heading towards the teacher and if the kid had not have spotted it, said teacher could have been "buying time" and hoping the 8 hours and shoddy hospital saves him!
Then came the actual work. After a couple of days of travelling and looking at the nice wildlife, it was time to actually study the rainforest and the kids excelled. Having to hack a transect through the actual rainforest was very different although I couldn't help thinking that the machete may have been more useful on the transects we did in Morecambe and Middlesbrough!
got to go again - its a tough life this being a dad thing! The jungle adventure continues soon! with the capuchin monkey comment explained along with much more....
The transect study was completed in a separate part of the rainforest located next to a very impressive beach that had been made by the river deposits. The view of the sun setting as we sat on the beach was breathtaking and was so beautiful that all the kids could think about was "MUDFIGHT!". One hour later the kids were no longer blue, they were now head to toe in brown mud and every last one of them had a huge smile on their face. They came to the rainforest to see amazing wildlife, incredible animals and have a once in a lifetime experience but almost half of them put 'mudfight' down as their favourite activity in the lodge survey. Kids will be kids whether they are in Birmingham, Bogota or one hour from Bolivia.
Now to explain the capuchin monkey comment. I was walking along with my group in the jungle when fruit started to fall from the trees around us. Looking up, we saw a troop of 7 monkeys looking down at us from the canopy layer. The boys started giggling and said "at least its not capuchin monkeys sir. We are safe for a while". I ignored the comment and we walked on. About 10 minutes later we heard more monkeys and this time, they were capuchin monkeys. "Watch out sir!" "Don't drop the soap". I had to know more. The story of the capuchin monkey is a strange but apparently true one. The capuchin monkey is a strong monkey that can easily grab fruit from trees but the Squirrel monkey is much weaker and so has to rely on picking up leftovers from other monkeys. They are therefore known to follow the capuchin monkeys around picking up bits and pieces oif fruit - so far so good. Unfortunately, if the squirrel monkey gets too close to the capuchin then it will grab it, beat it and in extreme cases....... rape it! The capuchin monkey has been seen sexually atacking smaller monkeys and it does not matter whether they are male of female, the capuchin is not a picky beast. So there you have it, the unpleasnant story of the capuchin monkey and the reason why the week was scattered with capuchin monkey jokes and comments - again kids will be kids whether they are in blah blah blah!
The final day saw us transferred to Refugio Amazona and back up towards the airport. This location was picturesque and looks a lot more like an exclusive hotel than the other two locations. The place had an impressive restaurant, massage room, bike hire centre and hammocks hung from the beautiufl rafters upstairs. It was packed with tourists but by this time the Markham Savages were tame and they sat an played chess from the hammocks as the sun set, with barely an inch of blue left on their tired looking faces. By half 9 as the electicity cut out for the last time, the kids had already taken themselves off to bed and were asleep ready for their boat trip and flight home the next day. No need for teacher patrols, no need to tell kids off, just a very pleasant group of kids shattered after a very tiring week in the jungle.
Thankfully there are no volcanoes spewing ash along the way back and so our flight was on time and everyone arrived safely; even Mr House had managed not to get biten by any killer bugs and thankfully none of the other passengers understood the capuchin monkey jokes being stated in the queue for bags.

A evry exciting week which is currently being followed by another very exciting week in Lima as Clare and Tilly arrive in the Peruvian capital to experience in reality what I have just been waffling on about in this blog for the past 3 months.

Fifi The Imaginary Dog

2010-05-06T19:31:00.003-05:00

One week to go!!!!!! and only one day to go at school and I am just about keeping awake in class at the end of this 10 week term. The Peruvian staff don't seem to know any different but like a true British teacher, I have been having a good moan about how long this term is (without a half term!). It is not true that all teachers moan but it does seem to be true that all British teachers moan. We are like a rare group of people who do know know when we have a good thing going for us. Even when teachers are in Peru, living a life they could not afford in the UK, in an exciting country and earning noticably more than they would in England (and with a 10 week summer holiday!!), they still moan better than teachers from any other country! (well apart from certain Ozzies).
The kids are also great here. They are fun, relaxed and know how to work hard. In my S2 class (year 9 / Upper Middles), the pupils are hard working, good at geography and are even kind enough to read this blog!!!!
In this class, one of the boys had not got his homework with him and so chose to use the classic "my dog ate the homework" as an excuse. Obviously I went along with this and kept asking about his dog, whether his dof eats any other paper substances, whether he could bring his book to school to eat some of the out of date geography textbooks etc.
Eventually it turned out that the boy in question did not even have a dog and that his dog was a figment of his imagination. Cue, much mickey taking and the development of his dog being in the class room, being taken for walks around the school and being Christened 'Fifi'. Fifi is now the official Geography Dog, when pupils trun up at the door, we have to calm Fifi down, we let her sleep in the corner and she is now a permamaent member of the S2 classroom.
Last lesson with the S2s, I agreed that if they worked well, then I would let them watch a video on YouTube. The problem was that the video chosen was called 'goat giving birth'. How loveley, a nice nature film. Apparently not, as the slow motion and close up nature of the video make it somewhat disturbing to watch and the jokey soundtrack filled with Goat giving birth chorus clearly shows that these people know just how horrible this video is! Mother nature works in starnge ways - as do people that post things on the Internet.

My final rant is about my cleaner. I have not seen him this week and I can guess why he is hiding away. "Hola, mister!" is his cheerful catchphrase but he will not be so cheerful when I next catch him. The current trend around Markham is for the stickers to fill the new Panini World Cup sticker album. The kids are going mad for it, they are turning up early for school to do 'swaps' and they have even poroduced tables showing which ones they still need (some have been done on excel with colour coding to show need, whether it is shiny and which country it belongs to). But some of the kids had been kind enough to ignore the prices that these stickers are going for on the black market and were handing me stickers from the England team. I was building up quite a collection, I had them organised in 4-1-3-2 formation, with Gareth Barry playing deep and Heskey supporting Rooney in attack. I had the England flag and an arrow linking the flag to the World Cup sticker (I had big money offers for that sticker!).
However, on Monday Mr "Hola Mister" thought it was a good idea to clear the stickers from my board and throw them in the bin! My collection that I had to beg hard to get, my collection which was sure to act as a lucky charm as England head to South Africa. How will they focus now that they have been ripped from my board, how will they know that they have to win the cup without the arrow I had drawn in red pen? Mr"Hola Mister" has a lot to answer for and when England are slowly trundling off the pitch after losing to Germany on penalties in the first knock out stage, just remember that it is all Mr"Hola misters" fault! He could have been employed as the man to polish the trophy, he could have used his plumero (Peruvian duster) and Don Limpio to make that trophy gleam - but not any more!

The collection has started again but lets hope, for the sake of the whole country, that it is not too late!

Adios y vamos Inglaterra!

JonnyPitt456 has a big one again

2010-04-29T21:24:00.004-05:00

I have finally got a 32 incher again and I got it from the supermarket. Clare gave me the go-ahead and we now have a flat screen HDTV to plug the XBOX into and receive the full highdef glory of the Microsoft game machine! I have been standard def for too long now, my blu-rays have been sat gathering dust and my Gears of War were getting somewhat rusty from lack of use. Watching copied DVDs from the street corner sellers may mean I get to see Clash of the Titans without going to the cinema but peliculars that are fuzzy, unclear and with decidedly dodgy sound are a long way away from the clear picture quality of 1080p of pixellated televisual goodness.
The deal of the week at Plaza Vea (the supermarket 4 minutes walk from the house) was a 32 inch Samsung TV for 1,400 soles. That sounds a lot but it is actually about £300. I could not resist and as the old TV in the house was not compatible with the XBOX or the Blu-ray player and had no remote. I had also been stuck watching films on my laptop which overheats so you end up with burn marks on your lap if you watch any film over 90 minutes long - watching the final Lord of the Rings may actually lead to a visit to A&E. Although visits to A&E are free and covered by your health insurance (if you phone within 24 hours). I am not sure what happens if you fall down the stairs and are not found for over 24hours?!?
So, I ordered the TV in Spanish, paid only speaking Spanish and then tried to leave the store carying the TV. "pare, senor". I had yelled at me.
Stop, why? The man then explained in a mix of Spanish and then charades when he realised I could not understand everything he was saying.
I will summise: His actions looked like I would be attacked if I walked down the street (is it an action? one word? one syllable? sounds like hunch?) with a new TV under my arm "es peligroso, cuidado" (I will apologise for my spelling now before Michael picks up on it). So instead, he called me a taxi and I enjoyed the shortest taxi drive of my life. 2 minutes and 5 soles later, I was back at home and the driver was carrying the TV up to the house.

I am now sat watching TV, the same dreadful American comedies that are on all the time but now I can play XBOX, I can watch films and I have an SAP button (a magic button that menas I can listen to football and baseball in English!!!!!).

But my Spanish is improving. I am using a quality website called Busuu.com - you complete online activities and can also chat to people online in the language you are trying to learn. Spanish people then correct your english and you then correct their Spanish - esta muy bueno.

Anywho, los Simpsons is just about to start so I have to go.

Adios

The parrot and the terapins

2010-04-23T07:04:00.004-05:00

Yesterday, I was in the staff room and some very sad news was delivered. Not that a boy had fallen off the climbing wall 9yes that happened too) but that one of the parrots that sit happily outside my room had died.
The parrots are a constant background noise whilst I teach and they are also a pleasant reminder of the tropical climate in which i now live and work and in which Clare and Tilly will very soon be coming to.
The news came without notice and the follwing events may offend some readers (avert your eyes now if easily offended).

One the evening of Wednesday 21st April, one of the parrots fell from his lofty perch and landed in the pond. For some reason the parrot could not fly away from the pond and was stranded. If the parrot had merely drowned that would not have been sufficient to merit a mention in the blog. But.... rather than drowning the parrot was stuck in the water whilst the terapins slowly swam towards him. I wonder what was going through the bird's head - maybe oh, good some friendly turtles are coming over to help - maybe oh, look my friends from the mini-zoo coming to say hi. But very soon the parrot's thoughts would have changed as he realised that these terpains were not friendly (they had not been trained by Splinter in the kindness of the human race and did not have anykind of martial arts training nor a strange love of pizza) - oh no, these terapins / turtles (I am not really sure of the difference) are killer terapins!!!!
The parrot could not escape, he was stuck in the water and just when things could'nt get much worse, the terapins started to eat the parrot!!! Yes, you read that correctly, they ate the parrot alive.
The head of science at Markham said that it would have been a slow and painful death and it gives me shivers everytime I think about it too much.
To make it even more sad, the other parrot now sits outside my room, no longer looking happy and content but looking lonely, pining for thr fjords and pining for his lost friend that he had to witness being brutally murdered by the killer terapins.

This parrot is deceased, this is an ex-parrot!

RIP my parrot friend.

Adios

Markham College Swimming Gala and Fountain Park

2010-04-17T11:50:00.007-05:00

Pictures courtesy of Jeff 'master photographer' Schwartje

Last Friday saw me attend my first school gala that I was not in charge of organising (who am I kidding, Hayley did the organising and I just turned up). Anyway, I had nothing to do with this and it was great!
The whole school crams into the stands to watch the swimmers and all the kids are dressed in their house colours. The blue house had people dresses as Avatar people and The Cookie Monster, the red house had Elmo, the yellow house had Pikachu and the green house had the grinch. They were all dresses in full costumes with no expense spared. The event itself had the kids all swimming in school swimming costumes and wearing silicone hats with their house emblazened on the side.
It was impressive stuff and much of the swimming lived up to the high standard set by the atmosphere at the poolside. School records were smashed, races had photo finishes, with Peruvian Natiional Judges as the time keepers it was all a bit more thorough that Mr Owen at the end of the pool stamping his pole and asking swimmers to 'plunge away'.
The finale was a staff relay and I had been training for at least a week to get into peak physical shape for my one length of the pool. I was in the best shape of my life (well my best shape this year anyway) and I was ready to go. I was wearing big board shorts as I was a tad afraid that wearing Speedos in front of 1,000 young kids may be an arrestable offence in Peru, but I was so pumped that even baggy shorts were not going to slow me down on this day.
The started called us to the blocks, I fidgeted with my goggles, fidgetted a bit more and then got into track start position. The crowd went silent and the started bellowed 'take your marks'. I was ready and my moment of destiny had arrived.
I tensed to pull back on the board, sprung forward just as the whistle went and dived in..........
15 seconds later, I looked across after just finishing and saw everyone else touch the wall. I had won my length! The crowd were cheering as I pulled myself up out of the water knowing that I had been good enough to win. This prestigious field included three women, a man with a sprained ankle, two 17 year old kids and an Old Markhamian who was obviously aged the wrong side of 40.My moment of glory had been short lived as I realised that nobody else was actually that good, but anyway I am sure a great man once said ýou can only beat what is put out against you'.
After the excitement of the swimming, it was off to fountain park in central Lima (Its not actually called that but I cant really pronounce the Peruvian name for it, so fountain park it is).
This park is a collection of fountains and light shows all set to music and with the chance to run through many of the fountains whilst trying to dodge the water (see the photos in the Flickr album).
It is a very enjoyable place and all the more impressive considering that we are in a desert. Where they get all the water from I dont really know and how they only charge the equivalent of 80p to get in, I have even less of a clue.
DJ tried to get us thrown out by spraying the water at everyone (no tocar el agua) was shouted at him several times through a loud hailer. He also then trespassed into the musical fountain exhibit and them persuaded me to venture into the fountain pyramid (see Flickr photos). The place is a must for anyone visiting Lima and the light, water and laser show is a unique event that has to be seen.

Adios

Tilly The Phillie

2010-04-17T10:11:00.006-05:00

Tilly is seen here wearing all the latest fashion musts. The cap from New Era with the striking 'T' logo on the front. Contrary to popular belief, it stands for Texas rather than Tilly (She also has a 'P' cap that stands for Philadelhia Phillies ((Rather than Pitt)).

She unfortunatley does not yet have any shiny tracksuit bottoms to go with the cap, nor a hooded top or any kind of garish jewellery (don't worry she will not be one of those scary earring wearing babies - they are everywhere over here! As soon as they come out of the womb! I think the checklist goes: check heartbeat, cut umbilical cord and then pirece ears).

And in the top image she is see demonstrating this seasons must have, the 100% Peru bib(these can be found at any good Peruvian tourist shop). These will be seen on all the major fashion catwalks of the world over the coming weeks usually featuring an added hint of colour, these colours normally depend on what the wearer has been eating recently.

More Tilly Fashion essentials coming soon!

Adios

Happy Birthday Clare Pitt

2010-04-12T19:36:00.002-05:00

Happy Birthday to my darling wife. Sending you birthday wishes and all my love over the bloggersphere (I hate that word). I will sing happy birthday to you over Skype later. I don't know the fun and clap along Peruvian version of happy birthday yet but it is definitely more fun that the boring English one. we will know it for next year. I am sure that Tilly will save an extra special nappy change for your extra special day.

Adios y feliz compleanos mi amor

Tilly Pitt out googles her dad

2010-04-10T21:16:00.003-05:00

Just a quick post

I was googling Tilly Pitt the other day and I soon realised that she is closer to the top google result slot than I am. Outdone by my daughter and she is only three weeks old!!

Adios

naked men and monks

2010-04-10T20:05:00.006-05:00

The first fieldtrip from Markham College was a strange occurance. A fieldtrip to look at tectonic action whilst only travelling 10 minutes away from the school (you couldnt quite do that in Birmingham, although the great Dudley earthquake does come a close second to the Lima coastline).

We started out at 7.30 (yep school really does start at 7.30 - its a killer) and we all jumped into a minbus hired for the day. The kids seemed aprehensive and did not look overly excited about the idea of a fieldtrip down the road from school.

Len Hussey was the man in charge of the group and he turned up to the trip attired in what can only be described as 'urban combat' gear. I felt a tad underdressed for the day without a bandana on. Len seems to break the trend of geography teachers wearing tweed and cords and instead wears a combat jacket, bandana and sunglasses (clearly remnants of his time in the Peruvian army!) (see the photos).

The first stop was looking at the cliff faces and where water is pumped out to be taken to the shanty towns of the local area. We then saw a coastal upwelling as water naturally pumps out of the ground as we reach the water table (an impressive site that started to get the kids interested in the day).The hunderds of boats in the sea is also a sight to behold. Hundreds of tiny row boats belonging to the local fishermen who provide the fish in Lima. The big trwaler boats only fish for fish to be sent abroad and the local fish comes from these tiny boats (see the photos in my flickr account).

the next highlight (apart from the tectonic faulting) was the strange man on the cliff face. Len was talking to the kids about magmatic insurgencies whilst a couple of the boys started giggling. I tunred to tell them off only to see what they were laughing at. Behind Len was walking a man who had just come up from the nearby shanty town, nothing funny in that, but then on closer inspection the man was not wearing any trousers ........or any pants!!!. He just had a jumper on and was slowly walking along the path, everything on show. Thankfully none of the girls turned around and Len kept focused on the geography rather than noticing this man's geographical feature of his own. Although even with his jumper on, he was clearly still cold!!!!

The day then progressed to plan, with no further nakedness and with the 18 year old kids getting more and more into the trip. That was until we reached the final cliff face and we were confronted by a monk. The monk prayed for us and held his crucifix aloft calling for help from the Gods. He then slowly walked around the coast and to the end cliff face (see the photo - you can just about see the monk). He then started praying again, before diving head first into the sea below. The pupils cheered and screamed, I panicked as the waves were huge, but he came back to the surface unhurt and then started clambering back up the cliff.

The day was a success and the oddness of some of the people in Lima never fails to impress.

On Friday I had to do a lesson with my form on respect. They had to list people that they do not respect and this time their prejudices rose straight to the surface. I went around the class, one by one.
"who do you not respect"
and the answers came thick and fast
"Bin Laden",
"terrorists",
"criminals",
"racists",
"my brother"
and then
"bus drivers"
"taxi drivers"
"gays"

yes, you read that correctly. One kid actually said gays. I stopped the session and asked how they could say that?
"have you seen gay people kissing sir?" he said "its disgusting"
so I stopped the lesson and spent 15 minutes explaining why they should respect gay people but the kid just would not have it.
Then the kids all spoke up and said
"ok, sir. We can accept the gay thing but we do not have to respect bus drivers. They cut you up, they shout at you, they are dirty, they have no respect for anybosy else, so I have no respect for them"
Now when they are talking about bus drivers, they mean the combis. They are not talking about your normal West Midlands Travel driver. These buses are a nightmare, they do cut everyone up, the buses are packed, they are dirty and the drivers shout almost as much as they use their horn. I could understand the kids' argument but again I tried to explain why respect is important. But it was like teaching respect and understanding of German people to a group of British war veterans.

Adios muchachos

Happy Easter

2010-04-01T20:49:00.003-05:00

With a Peruvian National Holiday this Thursday and Friday it has given me 2 extra days off. I have thus far spent it getting sunburnt on the roof terrace. The sunburn was fine but I have since found that sunburn plus a spitting frying pan do not mix well.

The action packed weekend has mainly been spent looking at c.v.s for a geography job at the school (my first big head of department duty) and doing more marking. Daytime TV is however preventing me from doing too much work (In Peru they do not seem to enjoy housing programmes, followed by auction programmes, followed by women who are seemingly loose, followed by more housing programmes and then another auction/antique/david dickinson programme. Instead they have Seinfeld followed by Everybody loves Raymond, followed by football, followed by Two and a half men, followed by Smallville and then some more comedy and some more sport - Its as if I am actually in control of the TV schedule. I also get to read along in Spanish as I watch). Plus, because the TV is from a line from the people who live downstairs, the 70 channels are all free!!! (I dont think the landlord realises)
The TV however is not compatible with my XBOX and so there is an XBOX and Blu-ray player sat in the TV stand, looking very nice, but not being of any use. My guitar hero skills are wasting away by the second!

The main reason for the TV watching is to take my mind off how much I am missing my wife and little miss Pitt. I know it will not be long but the last week has dragged and dragged and dragged so who knows how long the next six are going to seem.

Happy Easter to everyone who takes the time to read my random waffling, I hope it is not too cold for everyone back home and I hope it isn't too cold for those venturing off to Sweden.

adjo (thats Swedish for goodbye for now)

Unfortunately back in Peru

2010-03-26T16:28:00.004-05:00

After the excitement of being back with Clare and Tilly,

the reality of coming back to work hits home with a thud. The flight dragged despite the movies and games and food and books. I tried to sleep but even after 48 hours without sleep, I still cannot fall asleep on a bloody plane.

It never helps that the person in front seems to think it is their God Given right to put their seat back no matter that it crushes the person's legs behind (ie mine). Or that the person sitting behind thinks its ok to put their coat over the arm rest of your seat or that every time they get up to go to the toilet they pull down on your seat, therefore sending your head flying backwards, only to let go and lead to some kind of catapult effect with your chair that sends you hurtling into the person's seat in front - that is still fully reclined despite the fact that they are a midget!!!!!!

Anyway. I finally got back to Lima only to be surrounded by Taxi drivers trying to force you into an overpriced 'tourist car'. When you then inform them that you want to go to your house rather than to a hotel, they make a quick retreat knowing that you know how much you should be paying for the trip. Although even the tourist prices were only $35 for a trip that can take an hour and a half so compared to UK prices, this is not so bad.

Then the traffic hits, the taxi driver weaves his way in and out of gaps too small and very quickly you realise that you are back in Lima!!!

Thank you to everyone that has sent cards, good wishes and presents for Tilly. Clare is in the process of sending thank you cards but she, unsurprisingly, has her hands quite full at the moment.

Leaving them to come back here was bloody difficult but Tilly did give me a going away present of pooing and weeing down the only T shirt I had brought with me, just before I got in the car. I know there will be a lot more of this and to be honest I am even missing the crying and nappy changing already - and I miss doing that for Tilly too!

Until the next post

Adios

Pitt family

2010-03-22T08:41:00.003-05:00

The all new and updated Pitt family are doing fantastically well. The idea of getting regular sleep is already a fantasy but when you are awake at 3 in the morning with your beautiful daughter in your arms, you cannot even think about getting cranky or upset.

When she falls asleep on your chest and makes those little gurggling sounds that only babies know how to make, your heart just melts and you no longer care that you haven't slept in four days straight.

Tilly is absolutely beautiful (I know I am biased but I don't care) and she is getting more beautiful by the day.

Frank Lawton sent us an email with a poem attached a few months ago about the birth of your child and the poem has taken on extra resonance over the last few days (please excuse my artistic licence to edit the poem)

Tilly making her landing in the world

so hard she ploughed straight back into earth.

They caught her by the thread of her one breath

and pulled her up. They don't know how it held.

And so today I thank what higher will

brought us to here, to you and me and Clare

and now your lungs somehow out - revving

every engine in the Universe

all that trouble just to turn up dead

was all I thought that long night. Now the thread

is holding all of us: look at our new house

the white dot of your mother waving.

When he sent the email I did not fully understnd the full ramifications but after a night of waiting. After a night of Tilly being ready to be born and then deciding to drag herself back inside, for her heart to start beating slowly, for her heart to think about stopping and her the 'C' section to be called for. The thread of the poem suddenly became a reality, that thread was the all important factor as Tilly came from a weak heart beat to the amazingly strong baby she is today. This thread is now wrapped strongly around out new family and is like nothing I have ever felt before.

People talk about the idea of loving something more than you can possibly explain and that could not be more true. I have known this little girl for less than five days and yet the importance of her to both myself and Clare cannot be understated, cannot be put into words. I need the skills of the poet that Mr Lawton emailed to even come close but even he, I doubt, could properly sum up this occurance, this event, this amazing feeling.

Adios

2010-03-18T13:53:00.000-05:00

Baby Tilly has arrived

2010-03-18T08:20:00.004-05:00

18th March 2009.

I have become a dad. Clare has done fantastically well and we have a brand new healthy baby.

More information and pictures to come. Be prepared to get very bored of seeing pictures of our new baby girl.

Matilda 'Tilly'Pitt

D.O.B. - 18th March 2009

woo hoo!!!!!!!!!

adios

Legal resident of Peru

2010-03-15T12:32:00.003-05:00

Last Thursday was the day I became a legal resident in Peru. I now have to have permission to leave the country and have got my fingerprints, eyes scanned and all my teeth checked just in case I am an international criminal.

However, the day was not as simple as turning up, filling in a form and then going home (of course not - this is Peru). Why take five minutes over something when you can take allday?!?

So, I got there early. It is in the centre of Lima (see central Lima blog entry) and so the drive in was particularly interesting but we managed to weave in between the traffic and turn left from the right hand of 3 lanes enough times to make good time. So we entered (myself and Javier (( see the nightmare of Lima cargo city for more information on Javier)) and everything went well. The queue was remarkably short and just when I was about to be served, Mr slick back cut in front of me. Now, he seems to not understand the English method of queueing. You can wait for ages, you can moan as much as you want but never cut in front of somebody else (you may be asked to leave the Theme Park!). So Mr Slickback - named this due to his slick back hair and pin striped suit (see image at the top). I would have called him Mr tiny feet but I only saw his amazingly tiny feet after about 15 minutes). Really, they were the smallest feet on a regular sized man that you have ever seen.

So anyway, Mr slickback cuts to the front of the queue 9they can tell me that its called a line all they want, I will still call it a queue) and proceeds to get served. And then his rent a girlfriend also cuts to the front and she also gets served and then his man-servant cuts to the front of the queue and he also gets served. All the while, I am slowly simmering inside and I hope that he could understand English as I would hate to think my rude comments went unheard.

So finally after Mr Slickback and his entourage all get there fingerprints done I get to the front only to be told I am not a valid citizen as I am just a tourist. When i showed the man all my paper work, my visa, my contract etc all he does is point to the screen 'el computer Hable no".

When I ask why, in my best Spanish, he cannot just change the input on the screen to working status, he just walked away from his desk. When he came back he blanked me and asked the person behind for their documents.

This then kick started Javier. It did not kick start him to do anything it just meant he stood around looking angry a little bit more than he usually does. So I go to another desk and try to get my information changed. El computer says no. I am told again. Again I ask why, and the lady just gets up from her desk and walks away (this seems a Peruvian way of avoiding conflict with the strange English man who is shouting at them). So i am left with nowhere to go. I speak to Javier in our normal mix of pigeon spanish and hand gestures and he says he will do something.

3 hours later Javier comes back. He points for me to go around the back of the counters and into a back office (am I going to be deported or have some sort of cavity serach?). He puts his fingers to his lips and says "shhhhhh""say nothing". Say nothing, I think, how can I say anything with my lack of Spanish? So we go into an office, where Javier promptly leaves and I am left with 2 old women both talking none stop Spanish at me.

I shrug my shoulders and follow Javier's instructions. Then one woman grabs my bag and looks through. She finds my reading book and starts pointing. I try to understand what she wants and it turns out that she thinks I am an english teacher and she wants English books. I tell her that I am a professuer of geographie but this does not dissuade her. She wants me to get her some english books. I say that I do not teach english but she writes down her email address and says that she will email the details. I know that Javier has already bribed these people and now they want someting off me too.

After this she says that the 3 day wait that is normal to change details can now be done instantly. éverything is ok, she tells me. I am relieved but also know that in a few days I will be expected to get some sort of English book for this crazy lady. Oh well, what is the English department for if not to take books from?

After this point, Javier's 3 hours worth of bribing kicks in and suddenly I become slickback man. I am taken to the front of the queue, I push in fromt of the bank queue, I get my photo taken instantly and my ID card is ready in 15 minutes. Being Mr Slickback was not too bad an experince (I just need a man servant and a pin striped suit now).

So now I am a Peruvian resident. I have a house, a bank account, an ID card and pretty soon I will be learning to drive like a mad man and using my horn more than any human being should do.

Adios

Earthquake drill

2010-03-05T12:03:00.004-05:00

I kid you not. In 15 minutes we have an earthquake drill....... more info coming soon

The drill itself was not as exciting as I thought it would be. However it really is as simple as duck and cover. How exactly the desks will save the pupils from an earthquake, I have no idea but still we have to make them tuck up into a ball, get under their desk and cover their heads. Then once the bell stops we go out onto the field (presumably if the field is still in one piece) and check who is there.

It is a lot more dramatic than boring fire drills but you still get the same old boring teachers checking that everything is being done by the book. It is strange that in a country with no safety laws, teachers still find it necessary to make up the same pointless safety laws that they moan about back in England.

Then last Friday (on a day with shortened lessons and the loss of 2 other lessons) the powers that be call for another earthquake drill. I am now fully drilled on for an earthquake and on top of that, making your 6th form class get under the little desks is really very funny.

Adios

car crashes, houses and work

2010-03-04T20:41:00.003-05:00

Finally started work and what a nightmare it has been. There are not enough geography teachers until the new one starts in three weeks (an old lady called Wendy!), they are looking to move away from laptops but haven't ordered enough textbooks and a list of other moans all at the same time as starting to run a department.

Right, moan overwith. I was getting a tad fed up with the school but then the kids turned up. I thought they were going to be hard pushed to live up to King Edward's pupil standards but they are really running the KES boys closely. The kids are polite, neatly dressed, conscientious and above all, make it enjoyable to turn up to work for. All the complaints are quickly forgotten and you just get right on back to the classroom.

The first week in actually teaching (preceded by two weeks of teacher training and INSETS!!!!) has been a duty week. Normally I would have a good teacher moan about duty week but there is something quite pleasant about patrolling the school when it is 30 degrees outside. This week's duty of sitting by the outdoor swimming pool has been particularly arduous!

Back to the INSETs. The first one was an 'expert' on being a form tutor. The fact that she had never stepped inside a classroom in her life did not matter - 'she had done a course in the US' was clearly her main qualification. I think that this course in Chicago was clearly full of people full of themselves. 'Children are like trees' ' let them grow and care for the fallen apples'. I am not even making this nonsense up!

'How do you feel about your own self' 'how does this activity make you feel'

My reply was something along the lines of 'this is nonsense there is no way we would have time for this' - by the time you have done the register, given out detentions, checed little Pedro's lost bag, checked what activities people have signed up for, checked uniform and checked homework planners, there is very little time to put down the fertiliser of love and watch the fruits blossom into a caring child'. Fortunatly, this lady was only in for half a day and then I am sure she went off to another school or maybe another course.

I have also moved into the house (photos above). Clare had a list of criteria that needed to be filled: local park (check x 4), outside space (check), roof terrace (check), 2 double bedrooms (check), a study/nursery (check), spanish type design (check), 2 bathrooms + an extra one for the maid (check), a bath (check). I managed to get everything apart from the pool. However we will only be a ten minute walk from school where there is a free heated outdoor pool for us to use!!!! I cannot wait to bring up mini Pitt in our spaciuos new home.

The only problem with the house came when I had to go to el banko with the landlordo. We drove there sharing quality conversation (with my pigeon spanish and his pigeon english), and then waited (a Peruvian passtime) for an hour to get served. Finally we got the money and although I needed to go to work ,which was around the corner, he insisted on driving. A nice gesture but when we stopped at the traffic lights, the car behind smashed into the back of us without even trying to brake. The look of terror in el landloro's eyes was horrifying but nobody was hurt apart from the bumper fell off.

I finally got into work to find the TV switched off (the only reason I was going in was becasue they have cable and I could watch the rugby!!!). So after a car crash I dont even get to watch England lose to Ireland (probably for the best as swearing in school is never a great thing to do in your first week).

Adios muchachos

Lima Central

2010-02-21T14:59:00.003-05:00

Anew day, a new adventure. This time I ventured into the centre of Lima. The day before I had been chatting to my sister and she asked why I had not been on the bus yet? Because they are the most dangerous form of transport known to man, I replied. The crew of Apollo 13 would think twice before stepping onto a minibus (or combi) in Lima.

So, after she asked this I could only really use the combi on my journey into Lima Central (even if it was a silly idea). Michael had said that the buses in South America are high quality, well if Merry Hill Mini buses from cicra 1934 are high quality, that explains why Michael drives a Smart car (only joking mom!).

so I step onto the bus (not sure if it is really going in the right direction) and the driver sets off at a million miles an hour, with the conductor hanging out of the open door calling out for potential customers. Pot holes and huge holes are driven over with gusto (and there are a lot of these) but fortunately there is a combi lane. Unfortunately it is busier than the normal car lane and you cannot move. This does not stop the drivers trying to move, cutting each other up, cutting each other back up, and cutting each other back up again. On top of this the drivers like to answer their mobile phones (using them in strange Peruvian way whereby they use it like a walky talkie? The other Peruvian foible is covering their mouth with their hand whilst using the phone - I think they have had problems with deaf people decifering what they are saying and feeding it back to the corrupt government - or maybe they have all got smelly breath from the huge amount of red onions they put on absolutely everything!!!!!). Anywho I am sure it will not be long before I adopt the covered mouth position for my phone conversations (this may look a bit starnge for those of you that talk to me on Skype but you will get used to it). Plus this particular bus driver liked to read the newspaper whilst driving too - just to add that little more danger to the journey.

Then in the distance I see it! Not the city, but the smog that means the centre must be close. The end of the road cannot be seen for the think dust (and hygroscopic nucleii) that pack the air. As the traffic is going nowhere, jumping off and walking was the best option (why others dont also do this I am not sure ((they must know something about the area I dont)).

The buildings are typically colonial (run down colonial to be more accurate). This is like Buenos Aires but without a lick of paint being applied since the Spanish first came over. After all if its ain't baroque then why fix it!

And after the shiny security guard haven that is Mira Flores, real Lima finally struck me. Beggars are on every corner, mothers elbow their kids to go after the white man in the England shirt, people look at you everywhere (again for the whiteness). However, the beggars are not rude, they are not agressive and they are hugely grateful for money (rather than seeing you have more in your wallet and begging further). The people are polite (a lady actually stood on a corner warning tourists from going down there).

The central sqaure is beautiful (see cheesy video I made) and the area still carries this strange intangible buzz that Peru seems to have. There was a food festival, although only dougnuts were consumed and there was also the chance to listen to an awful singer (he also was hugely grateful as the money in his pot was tripled!).

Then to the Church ........ to be continued.

Peru v Holland

2010-02-20T00:03:00.004-05:00

So after the nightmare that had been the box pickup. What more could possibly go wrong on Wednesday. Well, on the way back from Alan's house (a really nice man who lives with his wife Pat and he is Head of Chemistry) my flip flop broke. It now flips but doesnt flop.

I then went to a bar in the evening with Kegan (Canadian), Luke (Canadian), Tim (Australian) and Jeff (Canadian). So there we were on our Commonwealth games of a few beers and in walked a group of black people. Nothing really odd there I hear you say. Apart from the fact it is odd in Lima as racism against black people would noormally mean that in a posh lounge like this, black people would not be let in. But anywho there was something else different about this group of men. I felt I knew a few of them but couldnt put my finger on it, and most importantly my brain was telling me why 'would I know a group of random people in the middle of Lima?'

then I had a brainwave. 'That one bloke looks just like Ruud Gullit' I exclaimed. Blank faces met my revelation. 'who's Ruud Gullit' was the reply from my ignorant commonwealthian friends. Does the queen not teach these people anything? Also, why are Canada even let into the commonwealth games when they think that real hockey is played on ice? Anywho, I decided that because I couldnt get anyone to confirm my star spot and because there was no reason that a famous sports star would be in a random bar in Lima, I did not go over to him.

Then in the paper the next day is the picture above. Tickets for Holland masters against Peru masters. It was ruud!!!!, the other bloke was Pierre Van Hoijdonk!!!! (scorer of 2 goals from 30+ yards against Blues in approx 1998), there were others too. And I had missed out on photos, drinks and chats about thrashing them in Euro 96! all because of people that would rather watch ice hockey and Aussie rules. What is the world coming to.

Adios

The nightmare of Lima Cargo City

2010-02-19T23:32:00.003-05:00

So Wednesday arrived and instead of a day looking at houses and apartments, I am told to go to a session on form tutoring. Ok, I thought. I will get to know the new tutors, get to know the heads of year and also get to familiarise myself with the needs of what they want a form tutor to do in a foreign school.

However, on arrival I was struck with my worst nigtmare. Groups tasks, role plays and getting to know each other exercises! I am 28 if I want to get to know someone I will shake their hands and introduce myself, and more importantly, if I dont want to get to know someone I have the right to that also.

So, after writing my name on the board, introducing myself, writing out my name badge and then drawing a picture on the borad that best represents me, we got to the nitty gritty of the day - oh sorry I forgot - we didn't get to the nitty gritty- we had an activity to draw out or make a represntation of what makes a perfect form tutor. I am not even kidding.

I think thats enough ranting about that. You get the jist, it went on for another 2 hours and on the plus side, I now 'understand my own limitations as a human being' and know that when I make a comment I do not really understand what I am trying to say - clearly not - as the lady would tell me what I was trying to say, after I had said something very different.

Then It was time to get my boxes from the airport.

5 days late and with storage costs acruing, it was time I get myself sorted and picked them up. So we drove at breakneck speed across Lima to the airport, arriving at 3:35 (the office shut at 3:30). Then Thursday - we leave school at 1:00 but this time we ge lost in Lima, then stop to pick up the drivers friend and arrive at 3:00 (only after rushing past the security guards who are screaming at me "senior, senior, Pare, Pare!). Ignoring the screams and thankfully not being shot at for terrorism threats, I get to the desk at 3:02 (it closed at 3:00).

Friday - another inset morning - and then off to the airport. These school drivers are very handy and very kind to be taking this non spanish speaking gringo over to the other side of the city yet again!. This time we get there for 2, I do not do my terror run through security, we have all the right paper filled in but this time the delay is peruvian beauracracy. One form stamped, to another desk, another form, stamped, then pay, then stamp, then another desk, then into the warehouse (a never ending store of boxes, all strangely knocked, dented or damaged) and I get to see my boxes. Then I have to compile a list (in Spanish) with the help of an old lady, of everything that is in the boxes. A lot of miming later, my boxes are checked (the mimes would have won any game of chirades) and I am given the go ahead. Not the go ahead to get the boxes, but the go ahead to pay the storage costs. Then we go back to the car, go to the driver entrance, then get stopped as we have the wrong pass. So we go into the building again, change passes and FINALLY get the boxes into the van.

Many thanks must go to Javier and Pedro for all their help and my ordeal is over.

adios

Beyonce in Lima

2010-02-17T17:57:00.001-05:00

Did I go to Beyonce because of the novelty of seeing a major star in a new city over the other side of the world? did I go because I actually wanted to? or did I just go because I knew Lil would be jealous?

To be honest I am not sure which was true but it was very different in reality to how I thought it would be. The venue is not too far from Mira Flores but with typical Peruvian traffic it takes an age to get there.

Only when you get close to the venue does it strike you just how divided this city is. The security guards line the streets as if it was a 1980s football match and when you get out of the taxi the white people get swarmed upon by beggars and random street cellars. 6 soles for a beer, a few soles for a pack of fags (The Canadian teachers also did not know what fags meant, so when I was calling the cigarette seller, the 'fag man' I think they thought I was being rude to him).

Then you have to see which entrance is yours. There is a common entrance (£15), a 2nd common entrance (£25), then a VIP gate and then a SUPER VIP gate. I went to secondary common but the elitism at every level is evident. I am not sure whether Biance knew that she was only close to the super rich in Lima or whether she didn't care as the money continued to roll in.

The conert itself was a bit of a let down. I expected 60,000 people all crammed together with no regard for health and safety (sort of like a British festival). However, it was ordered, non chaotic, with room all around you, and generally quite pleasant.

The crowd seemed just as excited that the world cup was on the stage as they were to see Beyonce.

Then the show itself started and it was good for about 5 minutes. However, she insisted on performing songs that are quite frankly boring! As my mom sais (they are songs that even Lil would skip on an album). Apart from Crazy in Love and that Single Ladies song, the rest was decidedly mediocre. I expected more and when I had got myself out of bed after being violently ill for 24hours, it had to be better than this to be fully worth it.

I am sure that Lil would have loved it. If I were a boy was done adequately, Ave Maria was belted out and there was a 5 minute Destiny's Child megamix (all this proved to do was show how much better their songs are than hers). The Alanis Morisette cover was strange but at least there was a song I knew all the words for.

Sorry about the shoddy video quality (its a bit from Crazy in Love)

Guns N Roses are here next month and then Bon Jovi in the summer. Plus at £25 pounds compared to stadium venues in the UK, this place is cheap as Patatas Fritas.

Adios

ESPNscrum Fantasy Rugby 2010

2010-02-15T06:47:00.001-05:00

ESPNscrum Fantasy Rugby 2010

so week two has finished in the 6 nations fantasy league and Michael is on top again - how does he do it?

The secrets of mystic Michael are yet to be revealed and exactly how he has managed to pick players like Bastardo (I think thats how its pronounced) and the walking muscle that is Haskell!

Nick Gately has shown good form to close the gap at the top and there still may be competition for top spot yet.

The match was not exactly great but getting to watch it with an hilarious Spanish commentary made a dull match slightly more enjoyable. Si senor could be heard every time someone got a kick and I think the commentators only knew the name of Jonny Wilkinson as they did not really mention anyone else.

I am looking forward to the next England debarcle only so I can hear the commentators again.

Oh and well done My Pardoe for a much more positive week.

Adios

paddington

2010-02-14T22:59:00.002-05:00

peru day one 001
Originally uploaded by JonnyPitt456

Deepest Darkest Peru

My photos

2010-02-14T22:51:00.003-05:00

Flickr Photos

click on the Flickr link to see the photos I have uploaded to the Flicker website

This is a test post from , a fancy photo sharing thing. Once you have been linked there, just search for JonnyPitt456@yahoo.com (people search rather than photo search).

Baby bump

2010-02-14T18:57:00.002-05:00

so there is 5 weeks to go. Clare is finally relaxed and doing well. The scan says everything is fine, baby is the right size but this still does not stop Clare worrying. Is my bump too big? Is my bump too small?

Reading baby books, going to anti-natal classes, reading more baby books, worrying, getting excited, worrying, getting excited, reading more baby books, reading more baby magazines etc etc etc......

, its all go. The anti-natal classes are hilarious. The nazi midwives read from a pre-determined script as common sense goes out the window and government waffle and targets are the order of the day. You even have to fill in a survey at the end as to how helpful your midwife was.

Heaven forbid if you cant breastfeed because according to These lot, if you dont breast feed your baby will catch any one of 10,00 different problems and most likely their legs will drop off and they will have 666 tattooed just under their hairline.

Then comes the dreaded fontanells - not only will your babies legs drop off if you dont breast feed but they will have lumps on their head that look like horns - oh, and then the sessions always stray onto talking about poo!!!!! Poo should look like marmite and then like mustard or korma curry if you prefer. The more yellow the better apparently. So we are now experts on poo, breasts and bonding! and remember skin to skin is always best.

As I said only 5 weeks to go and buggy is bought, sterilizer (check), millions of designer dresses (check), funny bath mini bath thing (check), moses basket (check), room temperature monitor (check), nappies (check), baby carrier thingy (check), muslim blankets (check), etc etc etc

However, as much as I joke about it. There is nothing better than being woken up in the middle of the night by the baby in Clare's belly kicking you. Seeing baby move inside Clare and knowing very very very soon, we will have our very first child to share our life with is just magical.

Adios

Pitty's aventure in Lima

2010-02-14T18:35:00.003-05:00

So life in Peru has finally started!

The wait since leaving KES has been a nice break. Especially with Clare being pregnant and being able to spend some quality time together.

As you fly into Lima, any preconceived ideas of a beautiful idyll are shattered as you see the first of the millions of shanty huts. For a geographer teaching about shanty towns is a yearly occurrance but no matter how many times you teach about Rochina or Edith Gardens, you cannot prepare yourself for the level of poverty that these people experience.

Then on your drive from the airport, the industry of this city pops out at you. This is why there is none left in Birmingham - its all here!

Then comes the driving. A six car pile up was taken as a usual occurrance but still I was pleasantly surprised by how easy the driving is. Compared to Santiago or Cairo, these drivers are pretty good. Its bit like Birmingham on a Friday evening but with crappier cars, more cutting up and thousands of horns tooting continuosly.

The hotel that Markham kindly provide is also pretty good. The wi-fi means that Skype is available from the second I got here and so the thousands of miles away from loved ones can be dissolved and almost forgotten about as you chat over the laptop and see each other via the nifty invention that is a webcam.

Then comes nice Lima. On the flip side of the coin (a Nuevo Sol coin) from the shantys and poverty is the richness!!! The Mira Flores area is where the school is located and this is an elite area of teh city. The shopping centre is built into the cliff face overlooking the Pacific and the gardens and perpetually watered in order for the elite (us) to forget just how arid this country is. The policemen greet you at every street corner. The security guards wish you buenos dias at every opportunity and you are made to feel very special.

Then comes your invite to Bibby's beach house. The deputy head: teaching and learning has a beautiful beach house that he kindly invited the new recruits to ; and so pisco sours, beers and tumblers of red wine whilst eating huge steaks (that can still be heard mooing) were copiously ingested.

The staff seem a good bunch and were fountains of advice about the school, the city, settling in and helping with Clare and bambino Pitty. The trepidations and doubts start to wash away as the sound of the waves of the Pacific ocean provide a soundtrack for a great start to life in Lima.

The Colin Bibby calls us to the deck to watch the sun set. We stand watching as the sun slinks behind the mid ocean stacks and slowly sinks down into the Pacific.

The setting may have been beautiful but not having Clare to share this sight with soon brings back the distance that Skype had dissolved.

This blog will hopefully be a regular update of life in this new city. I hope to have the time to keep it up and help people at home to share in this adventure that myself and shortly Clare plus one will be having on the other side of the world.

Adios